From Detroit to Seattle
by Grey24
Summary: Both Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey were born in Detroit, neither have met before up until that one interview in Seattle that changed everything. Christian's background is the same as it is in the Fifty Shades Trilogy but what's Ana's and why did she leave Detroit behind?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer:

 _I do not own any of the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy, the characters belong to E.L James. This statement applies to the whole story._

 **Chapter One:**

I looked at my watch and sighed, _4:30am_ and I had just finished work. I sighed again when I realised that I would have to be up again in approximately five hours, four hours really when I included my drive home and trying to get to sleep. It was cold out tonight, I wrapped my arms around my small frame to try and keep myself warm whilst rushing to my car. _I couldn't wait to be asleep._

Twenty minutes later I pulled up outside my apartment building and as quickly as I could grabbed my bag and my phone and jumped out my car and up the stone steps to my apartment. But as this was me, I missed a step and fell up of all things the stop steps grazing my leg along the way. _Fuck,_ that hurt but I had no energy left to dwell on it, ignoring the pain in my leg I carried on up the steps and headed for my apartment and straight for my bed.

" _Ana!"_ I groaned, four hours sleep was not enough.

" _Ana! Are you awake?"_ yes Kate, I am awake I thought to myself even if I don't want to be. Slowly I pulled myself out of bed and into my bathroom but not before noticing the sheer pain in my leg which I completely ignored last night, looking down at the damage I mentally cursed myself for not looking at it last night, dried blood and a deep graze across my knee, not to the mention the bruising which was started to form. I cleaned myself up and hobbled out of the bathroom, out of my bedroom and into the kitchen where my best friend was sat eating breakfast, she looked up at me and sighed.

"You look tired Steele, I know I sprung this interview on you but are you sure you can drive to Seattle today?"

"I'll be fine Kate, you can hardly go, you've got the flu".

"I don't know what I would do without you Steele" she croaked quietly as another one of her coughing fits started. I simply nodded and turned around back to my bedroom to get ready.

Kate is my best friend, I'd do just about anything for her which is true because what I'm doing today was going to be pure torture. Several months ago, Kate was granted an interview with some billionaire whom I had never heard of, all I knew was that he was going to be at our graduation next month to give a speech and hand out our degrees. It just wasn't my luck that today was that day and she was made up with flu so somehow she had managed to persuade me into going in her place.

Dressed in the best clothes I have that would possibly pass as slightly smart, I was ready to leave for Seattle. Kate was curled up the couch with her laptop resting on her legs. She passed me the interview questions and the recorder whilst looking at what I was wearing. Ignoring the look on her face, I put the questions and recorder into my bag, told her to eat the soup I had made for me yesterday and rest whist I dashed out the door towards my car and headed for Seattle.

Several hours later, Seattle was in my sights, I would soon be moving here, after I graduate with Kate we are both moving here to officially start our lives as adults. I pulled up outside my destination in the nearest available parking space, turned the engine off and sat there for a couple of minutes to try and calm my nerves. _You can do this Steele_ I told myself over and over again. Ok, time was up, time for Anastasia Steele to meet one Christian Grey. I groaned at the thought.

 _What the hell was that! What the hell was that!_

I can't even get my head around about what happened up there in his office. I have never in my life felt so intimidated by someone, he clearly did not want me there, his stare on its own could reduce someone to shrink down in size dramatically and just curl up into a ball. The man breathed power, that I could see and control, he sounded like a complete control freak. I groaned to myself remembering that I had actually accused him of that, I actually told him he sounded like a complete control freak and not so surprisingly he didn't even deny it. _'I exercise control in all things Miss Steele'_ he so powerfully stated whilst glaring at me.

I shook my head ridding myself of that memory. You'll never have to speak to him again Steele, you'll just have to see him at your graduation but I couldn't think about that right now, I needed to leave and now would be good.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two:**

I thought that as soon as I walk through this door and into my apartment Kate will bombard me with questions about the interview as after all it was her benefit rather than my own, and she did not disappoint. She nearly pulled my arm out its socket whilst dragging me through the apartment to the kitchen.

"Well, how did it go?" she asked as a sat down on one of the bar stools.

"Clearly you must be feeling better?" I asked, although it wasn't really a question, I could just tell.

"Don't change the subject Steele, how was it? What's he like?"

"It was fine"

"Fine, that's it, just fine. That's all I'm getting?"

"He answered all your questions, I even asked him if he was gay, why would you do that to me?...Oh and just so you know he was not happy about that"

"I had to know, society would want to know. He has never been seen with a woman, naturally you assume he's gay". I just shook my head at my impossible best friend.

"Well, is he?"

"Is he what?"

"Ana, seriously where is your head at? Whatever happened is playing on your mind".

"Nothing happened, and no Kate, he's not gay, here" I passed her back all the questions, and the Dictaphone which had all the answers on.

"Thanks, you sure you're okay?"

"Yep, I'm going for a run, I'll be back soon", with that I walked away, I could still feel her eyes on me but I needed some fresh air, I quickly changed into my running gear, grabbed my iPod and my headphones and was soon out the door. Running was probably not the best idea, what with a bruised knee from last night's little trip but I needed air so I soon ignored the pain and set off.

I soon got into my stride, normally I loved running, and it was a way for me to clear my head, but today all I could see was piercing grey eyes staring at me and it was making me feel uneasy. I stopped running and leaned against a wall, literally shaking my head trying to get him out of my head, it didn't work. I took a few deep breaths and checked my watch. _Shit_. I needed to get back, I was working again tonight, I took off running back home imagining instead that I was running away from him.

It was all quiet when I got back, Kate would most likely be in her room going through the answers from the interview, I strolled into the kitchen and rummaged through the fridge for something to eat. We needed to go shopping soon, and when I said we, it normally meant me. Finding nothing worth eating, I closed the fridge and headed back to my bedroom, it was only 7pm and I wasn't working until 10pm, I soon decided I needed a power nap, still in my running gear I crawled onto my bed, set an alarm on my phone and closed my eyes.

It felt like I had only been asleep two minutes before my alarm went off, I opened my eyes unwillingly and switched it off. I stared at my ceiling for a few minutes, I was so tempted to ring in sick for work tonight, I was too tired but I needed the money. I worked in a nightclub, I've only been there for just over a year, sometimes I enjoyed it and other times dealing with drunk, out of control idiots was just not worth it. But like I tell myself every day, I needed the money so I didn't have much choice.

I pinned my hair up and jumped in the shower, letting the hot water run over me. Five minutes later I jumped out, dried and got dressed in plain tight black jeans and a black lose fitted shirt, I kept my hair pinned up as normally that's where it ends up by the end of a shift, checking I had my phone, car keys and my purse I headed out of my room, the TV was on which meant Kate wasn't that far away. I headed for the kitchen deciding that I wanted a sandwich, I could hear footsteps behind me which only meant Kate was probably about to ask me more probing questions.

"I finished writing up the interview, you did great!" I looked up at her and smiled.

"Thanks, although please don't ask me to do anything like that again"

"I promise but you did great, you off to work again?" I was glad she was changing the subject.

"Yes, don't wait up!"

"Don't worry, I never do but you know the drill text me when you get there"

"I will"

"Good, love you Ana! I've got to call my parents, have a fun night, I'll see you tomorrow!" she said as she walked back towards her room.

"Love you too!" I called back.

I looked at my watch, 9:30pm, I better go, I turned off the TV that Kate had left on and headed out to work.

Twenty minutes later I pulled into the parking lot that was nearest the club, my parking could be questionable but I didn't really care. I continued on foot as I do every night to the club already passing drunken fools out on the street. As I do almost every time I walk down this street I ignore the comments shouted my way and made my way inside the club, all I could think about was roll on 4am.

By the time it got to 1am, I was ready to pull my hair out and scream, the club was busier than usual, there was quite a few Bachelor parties out tonight which meant dealing with extremely drunk men, men who also didn't know the meaning of 'personal space'. By the time 1.30am arrived, I went on my break, on my way back through the bar and into the back, something caught my eye, or should I say someone, someone with piercing grey eyes that were staring right back at me.


	3. Chapter 3

_Thank you for reading!_

 **Chapter Three:**

Before I even had the time to react, the Christian Grey was stood in front of me still staring at me. What was he doing here? _Don't look at him Steele_.

"What a pleasant surprise Miss Steele…" before I even let him finish his sentence I interrupted him.

"It's just Ana. You're here…wh-wh-why are you here?"

"My brothers stag do Miss Steele, now, why are you here?." Isn't it obvious why I was here, surely he knew I was working, I finally found the courage to look up at him and found him smirking at me, he already knew the answer to his own question.

"Isn't it obvious Mr. Grey?"

"Not to me Miss Steele"

"It's Ana, I…I work here", before I even had the chance to doing anything, he leaned down to my level, and whispered in my ear.

"I know Miss Steele", his voice caused me to forget to breathe and a shiver ran through me, I needed to get away from him, or he needed to leave. But before any of that, a pair of strong hands grabbed hold of my shoulders from behind and I instantly stilled not knowing who it was, in a nightclub like this it could be absolutely anyone, unfortunately Christian also noticed my reaction and was once again staring at me, but this time with a different expression on his face only I couldn't figure out what.

"Everything okay here Ana?" I relaxed a little when I recognised the voice, it was only Paul.

"Ermm, yes, everything is fine. Paul this is Christian Grey, Mr Grey this is Paul Clayton, he also works here"

"The Christian Grey?" Paul asks, Christian only narrows at him and slightly nods. Before Paul could speak him, Christian decided to speak.

"If you don't mind Mr Clayton, myself and Miss Steele were having a private conversation…" I just stood there and stared at him, no we wasn't, not really anyway. Paul looks at me for answers the same time Christian turns his attention to me. All I could do is nod at Paul in the hope he would understand, luckily he did.

"I was just coming to tell Ana she needs to stay behind after her shift, a message from the boss. I'll leave you to it", with that he walked away and back towards the bar.

"Where were we Miss Steele?"

"We weren't anywhere Mr. Grey, I have to go I…"

"CHRISTIAN!" Out of nowhere, some other guy appeared at the side of Christian.

"Who's this pretty lady? Am I finally meeting a girlfriend of yours?!" I just stared at this stranger open mouthed, girlfriend? For a few brief seconds I imagined what it would be like to be Christian Grey's girlfriend. _Steele!_ I shook my head, no girlfriend, I don't think so. I looked up at Christian who was glaring at this other guy. That's all he ever seems to do, glare at people.

"Miss Steele, may I introduce to you my idiotic brother Elliot Grey, Elliot this is Anastasia Steele, we met earlier today..." his brother, his stag do.

"The pleasure is all mine Ana, tell me what are you doing talking to my dear younger brother here? He's not exactly fun, I practically had to drag him out tonight" I bet I thought.

"I was just leaving, I work here" he just grinned at me.

"Join us for a drink Ana, it's my stag do!"

"I can't, I have to get back to work. Congratulations though, goodbye Mr. Grey" and before either of them could respond, I turned and walked quickly behind the bar and into the back corridor, I leaned against the wall and took a few deep breaths trying to calm myself down.

By the time I got home, it was almost 5am, I stayed behind after my shift had ended to see what my boss wanted. Turns out, I'm getting a promotion, to bar supervisor. I didn't see Christian or his brother for the rest of the night, according to Paul they soon left after I disappeared but not before they apparently had some kind of argument. But even so, I still felt like I was being watched by someone, I never saw anyone but I could feel someone watching my every move. Even when I was driving home, I still felt like someone was not that far away. I crawled into bed, not bothering to set alarm as it was now Sunday. I closed my eyes and dreamt of those hauntingly beautiful piercing grey eyes.

 **C.P.O.V:**

 _Anastasia Steele._ Who was this girl and why the hell could I not get her out of my fucking head. As soon as she left my office I demanded to have a background check on her, within the hour, I had it on my desk. What I read shocked me. She was born in Detroit, it made me feel a little uneasy just thinking about her there. But what shocked me most was that according to this, she has no family, she was and is completely on her own and has been from a young age. What happened to them? _How did she survive?_ What also shocks me is that from the age of 5 up until she was 13 years old she had been in and out of hospital. _Why?_ What the hell happened to this girl? Why the hell do you even care Grey? I needed to find a way to see her again, I carried on reading through her background check when my phone began to ring, without looking at the caller I.D I answered:

"Grey!" I barked into the phone.

"What's up bro!" Elliot my older brother, I knew exactly why he was ringing.

"What is it Elliot? I've got loads of work to do"

"I'm just making sure you are still coming out tonight, you can't miss my stag do bro!"

"Elliot…"

"No, don't even think about it, you're my brother and my best man, you are coming out"

"I'm not in the mood to be watching your drunken ass all night Elliot"

"You won't be, so, fly down to Portland on that chopper of yours and come out and celebrate with me"

"Helicopter Elliot, and why exactly are we celebrating, I can't understand why you are getting married…"

"Don't start Christian, just please for me, try and be supportive"

I was only half listening to what he was saying, my mind was elsewhere reading through Miss Steele's background check, turns out she works at a nightclub in Portland. Nightclubs are not safe places to work, she shouldn't be working there.

"Christian! Christian! Are you there?!" Elliot's voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Where are you going tonight?" I asked him.

"Wherever the night takes us little bro, I know you wanted me to use your club in Seattle but I just wanted something more me" I ignored that comment.

"What time?"

"Does that mean you are coming?"

"What time Elliot?"

"9pm, I'll text you the place. Thanks bro! I'll see you later!" he hung up before I could answer. I pressed another number into my phone.

"Taylor! Get Charlie Tango ready!" with that I hung up. To seeing you again Miss Steele. _FUCK!_ Maybe I just needed a new Submissive.


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note: Thank you for the comments so far, this is my first fanfiction so I apologise in advance for any mistakes that I make. Here's another chapter for you. Enjoy!**

 **Chapter Four:**

Sunday soon went and gone, I didn't wake up until past two in the afternoon, and even after I did, I spent nearly the rest of the day in bed, I just didn't have the energy to do much else. I spent most of the time thinking about the night before, my promotion and Christian, which was the last place I ever thought I would see him, even if it was his brother's stag do.

Monday arrived and it was officially my last week at University, I had today and tomorrow to do last minute revision before my exams start Wednesday, I didn't have work this weekend, I booked the full week off, Kate's orders, she wanted to go and celebrate this weekend after we officially finish out exams, I wasn't too excited about that, even though I work in a nightclub, I don't like partying that much, it just never appealed to me, I only work there because I was and still am desperate for money but I am a lot better off than I was when I moved here from Detroit when I was 18 years old. _Don't think about that Steele, it's all in the past, nothing and no-one will hurt you now._ A knock on the door suddenly brought me back to the present, I quickly stood up from the pile of revision notes I had spread out all around me and went to see who it was, it was most likely Jose, a good friend of mine who was like a brother to me, but nothing could of prepared me for who was at the door. _Christian…_

"Miss Steele…" what was he doing here? I need to stop being so imitated by him, I stood up straight and looked him straight in the eye.

"Mr. Grey, what are you…how did you know I lived here?" I didn't care to know what he was doing here, even if it was very surprising, I wanted to know how he found me, I never told him when I lived.

"I was wondering if you would join me for lunch Miss Steele" he needed to stop calling me Miss Steele.

"It's Ana, you didn't answer my question, how did you know I lived here?"

"I have my ways Miss Steele…."

"Please stop calling me Miss Steele" I said irritated, he just smirked back at me.

"Anastasia…" that sounded even worse.

"Ana will do Mr. Grey!"

"Very well, Ana…" the way he said it almost made me fall to my knees, _snap out of it Ana!_

"Would you please join me for lunch…Ana" he paused before he said my name again. Something just occurred to me, something I remembered from last night.

"Did you follow me home last night?" I asked, and because he didn't answer I took that as a yes.

"You followed me, why?" finally he decided to answer.

"I can explain everything if you let me…"

"Well I'm waiting Mr. Grey…"

"Over lunch, I will tell you" I rolled my eyes at him, I notice him take a sharp intake of breath and his eyes darkened and narrowed at me as he stepped closer towards me, naturally I took a step back but as this was me, I lost my footing and my balance, before I could do or say anything, I was in his arms. He held me against his chest tightly, I couldn't move even if I wanted to and right now I didn't, I suddenly felt safe. Eventually though I heard him sigh and then I was released from his arms but he still stood in front of me, we was almost touching, he reached out and stroked my cheek with his hand.

"Are you okay?"

"I…I, yes I'm fine…thank you" he nodded and stood back, quite a fair distance.

"Please join me for lunch Ana?" I couldn't think of an answer, I was too busy thinking about his arms wrapped around me.

"Ana?" he called my name, I just nodded. Without saying a word I grabbed my jacket, locked the apartment and joined him, I had a date with Christian Grey, I think.

 **C.P.O.V:**

It was luck that I saw her last night at the club where she works, it was that crowded I almost missed her. I wanted to thank Elliot for bringing us here, it would normally be the last place on earth I would associate myself with but if she was here, then I was staying. I had to admit, I could not stand this place, it was crowded, dirty and full of University students all looking for one thing and the fact that Anastasia worked here made it worse, I needed to get her away from this place and soon. Could she be my new Submissive?

After I finally got her attention, our conversation didn't go as smoothly as I would have liked, first whoever the fuck Paul Clayton was making an appearance by her side, I could tell by the way he looked at her that he wanted her. Well he can fuck off, she's mine or at least she will be. But I did notice her reaction when someone touched her back, maybe something had happened to her in Detroit, the thought made me feel sick. Surely she couldn't have a similar past like mine, she looked too beautiful and pure to be tainted with anything like that. Second, my brother, he just had to interfere, I know me talking to a girl would have been a shock to him, him along with my family all think I'm gay, but I'm not, I'm far from it actually.

After she left me, I stood and argued with Elliot, I was pissed at him, myself and her, I needed to talk to her for more than five minutes without her running away from me. After Elliot argued back with me, telling me to relax and drink a little I wanted to leave, I left the club but he soon followed along with his friends. I didn't care it was his stag do, I was leaving and going back to the hotel I had checked myself into earlier on. I didn't like or trust his friends but I wasn't in the mood for staying out and watch him get more shit-faced.

I got back to the Heathman and my mind wondered back to Anastasia. It didn't take long for me to start panicking about her, she was staying behind at the club tonight, what if something happens to her. I needed to make sure she gets home safe. I was soon back out the door and back to her.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five:**

Here I was sat in a small restaurant with Christian Grey. The multi-billionaire CEO Christian Grey and I still don't know why I am here, he hasn't spoken a word to me, he just keeps looking at me like he's trying to figure me out, just as I think this, he looks at me again.

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" seriously?

"I'd really like to know why I am here and why you followed me home last night."

"I know, and I will tell you but first I'd like to know more about you". _Oh crap!_

"Tell me about your family…" he continued, when I didn't answer he asked another question.

"Where did you grow up?"

"Detroit" I mumbled quietly back, he is not knowing my life story.

"And you moved here?" _I didn't have much choice I thought._

"Yes, when I was 18 years old"

"Why did you move?" What's with all the questions?

"Life got complicated" I snapped at him.

"You don't give much away do you Miss Steele?"

"I don't like talking about my past Mr. Grey, like you I am also a very private person"

"Fair point Miss Steele"

"Are you going to tell me why I'm here?"

"I wanted to get to know you..."

"Why?"

"Because you are an intriguing young woman, ever since you fell into my office"

"I want to apologise for what happened, I never meant to offend you when I asked you if…"

"I was gay?" I nodded.

"Nobody has ever dared to ask me that, not even my own family yet you did…"

"I didn't mean to, they were Kate's questions I just asked them"

"Did you not look at them beforehand?"

"No" I said honestly, I didn't even bother to look at any of the questions.

"I see, well Ana, apology accepted" I smiled.

"You called me Ana"

"That is your name after all", and for the first time he genuinely smiled at me.

"I want to apologise too, for shouting at you Ana, it caught me off guard"

"Apology accepted Mr. Grey"

"Call me Christian please..." I smiled at him.

"Christian"

We stared at each other without saying a word before he spoke up again.

"I did follow you home last night, but only because I wanted to make sure you was safe. Working in a nightclub is extremely dangerous Ana, after I left with my brother I went back to the hotel and left my brother partying but I couldn't shake the feeling that something might happen to you, so I came back…"

"I didn't see you again..."

"I didn't come in, I waited outside"

"For all that time? Christian, you didn't need to, I was safe, and I've worked there for over a year and nothing has happened to me…"

"That doesn't mean it won't Ana, why do you work there?"

"I was desperate for money and the pay is quite good, I didn't have much choice".

"I don't like you working there".

"You don't have to Christian, it's my job, and plus you don't even know me"

"I'd like us to be friends". _Friends? Be friends with Christian Grey?_

"Friends?"

"Yes, I told you, I find you very intriguing, and I'd like us to be friends".

"Ok, just friends?" _Oh why did I have to say that?_

"Are you blushing Miss Steele?" he smirked at me. I shook my head.

"Ok, friends it is Mr. Grey" I held out my hand to shake his. He smirked at me again and shook my hand, I couldn't help but feel that electric shock type feeling again as his hand squeezed mine just like it did when I met him. Just before I could speak again, someone interrupted us.

"Christian?" he let go of my hand straight away and when I looked at him he looked frozen to the spot. I followed his eyes and looked at the person standing next to our table. An attractive older woman stood there, dressed in all black and blonde hair, she was staring at Christian just as intensely as he was staring at her. Clearly something happened between these two. I saw Christian shift in his seat before he spoke.

"Elena, what brings you here?"

"I stopped by your apartment and you wasn't there. I saw you in here whilst I was passing, I was wondering if you had the chance to read through the email and the documents I attached to it and plus you haven't been answering your phone, you never ignore my calls?" she said looking directly at me, why was she looking at me like I was just something she wanted to stand on.

"I've been busy, Elena we can discuss all of this later, I will call you" he told her, noticing that she was just staring at me. Finally though she broke her gaze and looked at him.

"Very well Christian, are you not going to introduce me?" he didn't speak at first he just glared at her, I decided to speak.

"I'm Ana, Christian's friend"

"A friend, the Christian Grey I know doesn't do friends, he doesn't have the time, he has his family and me, and you call him Christian" I seriously beginning to dislike this woman. Well why wouldn't I call him by his name?

"Well now he has one" I smiled politely at her before looking at him, he didn't smile back, he just looked at me, maybe we wasn't friends after all.

"I will leave you to it, I'll wait for your call Christian" with that and one last stare at me, she turned and left. I waiting for Christian to speak first but he didn't so I did.

"Did I say something wrong Christian? Are we not friends because you just…"

"I can't do this Ana…"

"You can't do what Christian, be friends with me?" I asked although I already knew the answer.

"Ana I, let me explain..."

"You don't need to, I understand completely" I didn't but I wasn't going to let this bother me. Before he could say anything else I stood up from my seat.

"Goodbye Mr Grey" and without another glance at him, I turned and left the small restaurant and started the long walk back to my apartment.


	6. Chapter 6

_Authors Note: Thank you again for reading and commenting on this story. There's a bit of drama over the next few chapters so I hope you enjoy!_

 _Thanks again for reading!_

 **Chapter Six:**

"Pens down", finally my exams are over. I put my pen down and sigh. I have officially left University, I now have to enter the real World, whatever that is.

It's been an extremely long week, especially since Monday, I haven't seen or heard from Christian since I left him at the restaurant so I can only assume he didn't really want us to be friends after all. I make my way outside the exam hall and spot Kate sat on a bench waiting for me. She jumps up when she sees me coming towards her.

"How did it go?"

"Fine, I think, I'm just glad it's all over"

"Me too, we have officially finished! We are so partying tonight Steele" I try and protest, I don't want to party, I want to stay home, read books, watch films.

"Look Kate, I don't think…"

"No, I won't hear it, we are going out, Jose is coming with us along with a few others, it will be fun!" I sighed, there really wasn't much point in arguing with her.

"Fine"

"Excellent, now let's go home and get ready and get drinking, I've already bought the wine!" I groaned, I needed a nap first.

Once we got back to our apartment building, I checked the mail, apart from our usual bills to pay there was another one handwritten addressed to me. I followed Kate up to the apartment and into the kitchen. She straight away got the bottle of wine out along with two glasses, I guess the celebrating starts now. She passes me a full glass of wine and demands I start drinking. I can just see how this night is going to go. I left the kitchen and my glass of wine and walked to my bedroom to dump my bag, jacket and shoes. I sit down on my bed and open up my mail.

 _Dear Anastasia,_

 _I want to apologise for the way we left things on Monday, I understand why you left but I want to explain everything to you. I do want us to be friends but I need you to give me a chance. I hope your exams went well. Please call me so we can talk._

 _Christian._

He's left me his number, he wants me to call him, call him and say what exactly. I picked up my phone and typed his number in, I debated on whether to call him now but after several minutes staring at my phone and I decide against it, instead I just save his number and head back out to find Kate and get ready for tonight.

Several draining hours later, we were out drinking and celebrating our freedom with our friends, I try hard to socialise and celebrate even if my mind was on Christian, I still haven't called him, I don't know if I should, maybe it's for the best we don't become friends, if that's what he's even after, I don't even know him. Pushing my thoughts aside, I stand up to go and use the restroom, I stand in line and wait to use the toilet. I pull out my phone, unlock the screen and stare at my phone, I scroll through my contacts until I reach Christians number, I almost press call but instead open up a new text message.

 _I don't think we should be friends._

I hit send before I can even think about changing my mind, he will just have to understand my decision. I shut my phone off so I'm not tempted into looking at it or call him. After for what felt like a long time, I headed back to my table where my friends are and find it empty, I look around and it doesn't take me long to spot them, Kate and Jose are at bar and our other friends are on the dance floor, I spot my half-drunk bottle of beer still on the table, I make my way over to pick it up drinking some and then head over to the bar where Kate and Jose have just ordered tequila shots, they pass me one before I even have the chance to decline.

I should not be feeling like this, after just two bottles of beer and only half a tequila shot because I couldn't do it all I should not feeling this bad, I feel like I've had ten shots of tequila and can no longer see straight or walk in a straight line. I don't know where Kate is, or Jose, I've lost everyone. I've somehow made it outside and into the parking lot. I can hear shouting, laughing and screaming all around me but I can't see clearly where it's coming from, I don't even know where I am. I start to panic, maybe I could try and walk home, at least I know no taxi will let me in in the state I've got myself in or didn't get myself in because I did not do this to myself, I know I didn't. I stumble onto the side walk and try to walk in a straight line. This is not good. I manage to stumble a little further before hearing voices behind me, male voices. I try to keep moving as quick as I can, but I can still hear them only now they are shouting me. Somewhere in my drunken-memory state I pull out my phone, I wonder why nothing is happening and then I realise I turned it off hours ago, after several attempts I manage to switch my phone on, it feels like hours I've been waiting for my phone to start up, I feel really ill and really faint and exhausted, _I must not pass out, I must not pass out, just keep moving Ana!_ Finally my phone comes alive, through my blurred vision I ignore all the texts and missed calls I've received, I notice most of them are from Christian, I bring Kate's number up and press call, she doesn't answer, neither does Jose, why is nobody answering their phone! I bring up Christian's number and press call, desperate times calls for desperate measures. I just hope he's not asleep, but it is after 2am. After only two rings, he answers:

"Grey", I try to speak but my throat is all dry, _speak Ana!_

"Chris…Christian" I croak out.

"Ana…Ana is that you?"

"I ne-eed your help, please…I…please"

"Fuck Ana! What's happened, where are you?!"

"Chris...Chri…Christian…please"

"Ana, listen to me, talk to me, and stay on the line"

"Help me…Christian, please" I say just before stumbling forward and hitting the ground, my phone drops out of my hand, into a puddle, the screen smashes into a thousand pieces ending my call with Christian. Now I am completely alone or so I thought.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven:**

 _Where am I? Am I even alive?_

I can't remember a thing from last night, the last thing I do remember is having tequila shots with Kate and Jose at the bar, maybe that's why I have a pounding headache and feel sick to my stomach. I hear beeping notices in the background, am I in a hospital? Why am I here? I open my eyes, it's too bright in here, I quickly close my eyes again. I groan quite loudly and then I hear footsteps coming towards me.

"Ana?" I know that voice. I open my eyes again and find Christian Grey staring down at me, his face inches from my own.

"Whe-where am I?" although I'm pretty sure I'm in a hospital.

"You're in the hospital, how are you feeling?"

"Wh-why am I here?"

"What do you remember from last night?"

"I don't, I don't know, stood at a bar I think with Kate and…where is she?"

"I've sent her home, I'll call her" he said whilst reaching for his phone.

"Wait…" he paused, sat back down and looked at me.

"What happened? Why are you here? I don't remember seeing you…I" I ramble on and on beginning to panic, what the hell happened to me?

"Ana, calm down, I will explain but first I need to find a doctor to come and look at you now you're awake"

"No, please don't leave"

"I won't leave you"

"Please tell me…" he sighed.

"I'm guessing you was out celebrating, at some point in the night…Ana, you're drink was spiked, that's why you don't remember anything. Somehow you managed to get outside and call me asking for my help. I tried to keep you on the line and talking but the phone line went dead…"

"How did you find me?"

"I tracked your cell, luckily I managed to get your location before I was cut off and then…"

"Why are you not back in Seattle?"

"I'm staying at the Heathman, that's where I was when you called, I was with my brother"

"Thank you, I, you saved my life" he didn't say anything.

"You had me worried, and I don't normally do that. You're extremely lucky Ana" before I could speak, the doctor came in to check me over. Much to Christian's obvious disapproval I kept telling the doctor I was fine and that all I wanted was to go home and forget about all this, he on the other hand wanted me to stay in the hospital, not a chance, I'm going home.

"Ana, you need to stay in the hospital…" I interrupted before he could finish.

"No I don't, you can if you want but I'm going home"

"Ana…"

"No, I'm not staying here, I hate hospitals, and I'm going home" before he could reply, I got out of the hospital bed, too quickly I assume because the next thing I know, I'm in his arms again, he holds me tightly against his chest like he's afraid to let me go. I just stand there with his arms wrapped around me and close my eyes, he smells unbelievably good. Eventually though, he pulls away from me but doesn't let me go all together.

"Do you still not want to be friends?" he asks me, I look at him confused, he carries on once he sees my confusion.

"I'm assuming you got my letter because you text me earlier on last night saying you didn't want to be friends"

"Oh…"

"So…"

"We can be friends" he smiled.

"Good" he lets me go and I sit back down on the hospital bed.

"As a friend, may I take you home Miss Steele?"

"I thought we got over the whole 'Miss Steele' thing? I replied rolling my eyes at him.

"Don't Ana…"

"Don't what?" I ask but he ignores the question.

"Seeing as though you're determined to go home, I'll leave you to get ready and then I'll take you home" I nodded and watched him leave my hospital room and leave me with my own thoughts.

 **C.P.O.V:**

What the hell was I doing, here I was walking up to Ana's apartment building to post a letter to her that I had wrote myself, I never do this, ever. There was just something about her that I could not shake and it was beginning to drive me crazy. Ever since she left the restaurant on Monday she's been on my mind constantly, I don't really blame her for walking away, after convincing her I want us to be friends I then tell her we can't. All because of Elena.

My past with Elena is difficult and I hope I never have to explain it to anyone, especially Ana, she would be disgusted with me, and rightly so, I'm disgusted with myself but even now at 28 years old, Elena still tries to control my life and I just let her, she's controlled it since I was 15 years old. She's controlled every submissive I have ever had, it's got worse over the last year. A year ago I tried to make the decision to leave the BDSM world behind, it's not that I didn't enjoy it, I loved the control it gave me but with every submissive I have had, I got bored very easily and therefore I terminated our contract without a second glance. So, a year ago I told Elena I didn't' want another submissive, my reason being I was just too busy with GEH, which was true to a certain extent but she refused to believe that was what I had wanted. Three months later, a deal in New York had gone extremely sour and I needed something to help with the stress and pressure I had put myself under, therefore I had ended up at a private BDSM club, I hadn't been to once since I was 21, once my empire took off and my face was getting recognised I couldn't go to them anyone. Before anything had actually happened at the club I realised I couldn't be there and left but that didn't stop me from calling Elena asking her to have a girl in my playroom with the next hour, and since then, I've let Elena have more control over my life.

Therefore on Monday, when she showed up at the restaurant whilst I was with Ana, I panicked. I'd come to realise I couldn't bring Ana into that world, from the little I did know about her, she didn't belong. But that didn't stop me from wanting to know her, I had every intention of us being friends but without Elena knowing. The way Elena look at Ana frightened me, it was a look of pure disgust and hatred and I could not do that to Ana so I told her I couldn't be friends and then I had to watch her leave. I know Elena and I know she would do anything to get Ana out of my life and I couldn't let something happen to her.

For the rest of the week, I battled with myself with what I should do and it's resulted in me being here posting a letter to Ana basically asking her to call me so that we could talk and I could explain. After I got back to the Heathman all I could do was wait and wait, I check my phone at least twice a minute but nothing, I knew she had exams so I just hoped she wasn't back at her apartment yet. Later on in the evening and still no word from Ana, I decided to call my brother Elliot for company and we met at the hotels downstairs bar and restaurant for dinner, I decided not to drink, my head was already confused as it was. It got past 11pm when my phone finally buzzed, a text message from Ana: _'I don't think we should be friends'._ What? That's all she's going to say, no explanation as to why not. I tried calling her back but she had turned her phone off which just pissed me off.

I eventually went back up to my hotel room, I let Elliot stay in the hotel room with me as he had had a few beers, he slept in one of the spare rooms. I sat down at my desk and decided to work, I wouldn't be able to sleep, I kept trying to call Ana and send her text messages but her phone was still switched off, sooner or later she would have to switch it on. Before I knew it, it was past 2am, shutting down my laptop I decided maybe I should just go to sleep for a couple of hours. I sat down on the bed and then my phone rang, without looking at the caller ID I answered, who was calling me at this time.

"Grey" I snapped, sometimes I wished I didn't have phone, it constantly goes off.

"Chris…Christian" a small voice croaks out. Ana. What's going on?

"Ana…Ana is that you?"

"I ne-eed your help, please…I…please" something is definitely wrong with her, is she drunk?

"Fuck Ana! What's happened, where are you?!" I demanded.

"Chris...Chri…Christian…please" I think it's more than her being drunk, I immediately begin to panic, I needed to find her, I needed her to be okay.

"Ana, listen to me, talk to me, and stay on the line" I told her whilst tracking her phone.

"Help me…Christian, please" I will Ana, I told myself, but first I had to find her location. Before I could say anything, something happened on the other end of the line and it went dead.

"FUCK!" I roared, I had temporary forgot that Elliot was in the same hotel room as me, he must have heard me shouting because he came out of his room, I looked at him for maybe half a second whilst grabbing my phone and keys, I demanded he came with me, I might need his help.

I managed to track Ana's phone, from the looks of it, she wasn't far away and was near where she works, so I'm guessing she had been out drinking, why was she alone, why wasn't anyone with her. Eventually I pulled up outside some bars and got out. She can't be that far away from here, or at least her phone was. I continuing running down the streets, I eventually stopped still in my tracks and all the colour drained from my face, all I could see was red.

There was Ana, but she wasn't alone. Two men were standing in front of her trapping her against them and a wall, she had no escape, it's a good job I had brought Elliot with me, he was stood behind me. Before I could even think of about what I was doing, I launched myself at both of them, Elliot right behind me, he knew I wouldn't do this for anybody, especially when I felt like killing someone. As soon as I got my hands on them, Ana collapsed on the floor, a part of me wanted to go to her but an even bigger part of me wanted to beat the shit out of these guys.

My fist soon made contract with one of them, Elliot had the other one pinned up against the wall, I can always count on my brother to have my back. Before I could do much else, Taylor my personal bodyguard showed up and pulled me away, telling me he would deal with this. I looked at Ana, she was on the floor, her eyes were closed. I ran to her and knelt down beside her.

"Ana! Ana! Open your eyes!" nothing happened.

"Please Ana, open your eyes for me" she started whimpering in my arms and whispering my name.

"It's okay, I've got you, your safe with me", I whispered to her whilst holding her tightly, I needed to get her out of here and to a hospital, something was seriously wrong with her.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Authors Note:**_

 _Thanks again for the feedback, I appreciate it, this is my first fanfiction that I've actually shared with anyone so I'm glad you like it, I might share my others at a later date, the idea for this story just popped into my head. I know at the minute you don't know much about any of the characters, especially Ana, only the last chapter you got a bit about Christian, I have changed his slightly, but in time you will know a lot more. I'll just point one thing out before you do read on, Ana and Christian don't end up together YET, there's a few obstacles that they have to face together first. There's a lot more of Elena coming up, Jack Hyde will be in the story too along with Christian's family. Plus I know I have Elliot already engaged in this story but that doesn't mean him and Kate won't meet and have their own love story, just be patient. There's a bit of a time jump in this next chapter but not by much, I hope you enjoy it and thanks again for reading!_

 **Chapter Eight:**

It's been two weeks since I left the hospital, and if I am being completely honest, it's been the best two weeks I have had in a really long time aside from the occasional argument between Christian and myself but other than that we've become friends, we talk on the phone nearly every day and even if we don't we text or email each other, much to Kate's annoyance, she doesn't trust him, not that I don't blame her, he doesn't like her much either, I found out later on that they both had it out with each other whilst I was unconscious in the hospital. But even so, they both try and keep it civil when they are around me. I think it also has something to do with Christian's brother Elliot, Kate won't admit it but I know she likes him but he's engaged, he's getting married in a matter of weeks, we are both invited to the wedding, they also met whilst I was in the hospital and hit it off straight away, they are trying to be friends.

One of the few arguments I have had with Christian was about my job, he hates it, I think he probably more than hates it, he doesn't think it's safe especially after what had happened to me, I took the blame for that, I picked my beer back up from the table after my friends had left so it was my fault, I shouldn't have been that stupid. Christian made me take a week off work so that I could recover even though I felt fine, he wasn't convinced. So I finally went back last week, even though he won't admit it, I know he's having me followed, I can feel someone watching me all the time I am there and even when I'm driving home at 4am I still have that feeling, I've asked him several times about it but he keeps saying he doesn't know what I'm talking about, I know different. That was another argument we've had, my car. He doesn't think it's safe, he wants to buy me a brand new one, I refuse to even think about his offer, there is no way I am letting him buy me a car just because he thinks he should.

Pushing all that aside, I'm stood in my bedroom looking in the mirror trying to decide what to wear, it's the day of my graduation, I've been dreading this more than anything, I have no family there to support me or congratulate me on probably my biggest achievement or the biggest day of my life up to date, Kate and Christian have both told me I'm not alone, but neither of them could possibly understand this feeling I have, they both have loving families, I don't, it's that simple. Christian is handing out the all the degrees today, including mine, I'm rather nervous about that too, I'm nervous about the whole day and I just want it over with, I've finally decided on what to wear when my phone bleeps.

 **Are you all set? C**

 **No, I'd rather not be going. A**

 **You'll be fine, I'll see you there. C**

Again with the whole, you'll be fine, doesn't anybody understand that I won't be fine, I'm a nervous wreck now, I'll be so much worse once I'm there, maybe I shouldn't go, I'll just stay here locked in my room. Before I can even contemplate the idea, Kate bangs on my door.

"Steele, it's nearly time to go. Are you ready?" I didn't answer so she bangs on the door again.

Steele!"

"YES! I'm nearly ready! Just give me five minutes will you!" I yell back at her. I suppose I can't escape now, she'll be standing outside my door waiting for those five minutes to be up. Finally I am dressed and ready to go, I open my door and I was right Kate is standing there.

"You look beautiful Steele" I smile as I walk past her. I decided to wear a grey alter neck dress with my favourite black heels, favourite because I can somehow manage to walk in them without falling over.

All too soon though we had arrived at our graduation, families and students were everywhere, everybody in their graduation hats and gowns. I stood with Kate and her family whilst waiting to go inside the hall.

"You look beautiful" I turned around to come face to face with Christian, I looked sceptically at him.

"What? Can't a friend tell another friend that's she's beautiful" he smirked.

"Hello Mr. Grey!" I smiled back at him. He reached for my hand and kissed it. I shook my head.

"How are you?"

"The same as I was the last time you asked a few hours ago, I don't want to be here Christian" he pulled me to one side away from everybody else.

"What's wrong?" he asked me, looking straight into my eyes.

"I just, Christian I have no family here. Look at everybody around us, there's family all over. I know I shouldn't complain about this but…"

"Ana, one of these days you are going to tell me about your life in Detroit…" I shook my head, no I'm not.

"Ana, you are not alone here, you have Kate and her family and by the looks of it, you are close to them…and you do have me" I didn't say anything, I just looked down at my feet, he lifted my chin up back up to look into his eyes. He did have the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. _Stop it Steele!_ _You are friends!_

This was another thing that was bothering me, we'd become good friends over the last couple of weeks and I actually was beginning to really trust him but I couldn't not be extremely attracted to him, in fact he was the most beautiful man I had ever seen on the outside and especially on the inside but I know he didn't see me that way, he just wants us to be friends and I somehow had to get over my little crush that was developing rather quickly. Kate always tells me I need to date more, maybe I should ask her to set me up with someone, so I would stop thinking about this beautiful man in front of me.

All too soon, it was time for me to finally graduate. I sat in the audience whilst important members of our University were introduced, Christian was sat up there with them, he told me he was giving a speech today but he didn't tell me what it was about, at one point we caught each other eyes and he winked at me, I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing, he narrowed his eyes and glared slightly which only made me want to laugh more. He's told me on more than one occasion to stop biting my lip around him, every time I asked why, he changed the subject.

"Did you see that? He winked at me, he definitely winked at me" a girl sat in front of me whispered to her friend. I rolled my eyes at her.

"He's gorgeous" her friend replied.

"I might see if I can manage to talk to him afterwards"

"I think you've got a real chance, he's looking this way again" as she said this I looked up, he was looking this way, he was looking at me again, I shook my head at him, he smirked back.

"Look, he's smiling at you. You have to talk to him as soon as you get the chance, maybe you'll marry a billionaire…" I actually did laugh then, they both turned around and stared at me, I looked the other way none the wiser and turned my attention back to the Chancellor of the University who was introducing Christian.

"..It is our greatest honour, so please welcome Mr. Christian Grey". Christian stands up from his seat, fastens his suit and shakes the Chancellor's hand and then makes his way to the centre of the stage and up onto the lectern, he looks around the hall but doesn't look at me this time. He begins his speech…

"I'm profoundly grateful and touched by the great compliment accorded to me by the authorities of WSU today…" as he was talking, I looked around the hall, every single person was looking at him, watching his every move as he talked. Nearly all the girls in here were leaning forward staring at him, some even with their mouths open. I turned my attention back to Christian.

"…Our aim is to develop viable and ecologically sustainable methods of farming for third-world countries; our ultimate goal is to help eradicate hunger and poverty across the globe…I have known what it's like to be profoundly hungry, this is a very personal journey for me…" _What?! He's never told me this? Maybe you should him ask more about his life Steele!"_

His latest confession in front of all these people has completely thrown me off guard, why didn't he tell me? We are friends after all, I know he was adopted when he was four but that's about as far as we've got, we've never brought up our pasts, because neither of us want to talk about it. I definitely can't tell him about mine, he will never look at me again, and he would think I'm a freak. My mind is brought back to the present as I hear clapping, Christian has finished his speech and is now stood waiting to give out our degrees.

It takes a while and my nerves are getting the better of me the longer I sit here waiting for my name to be called up, maybe I could just sneak out now, nobody would notice. But before I can think about that any further, my name is called up. I walk up to the stage praying I don't fall over, but as this was me and as I was extremely nervous I almost did fall over my gown but a hand caught me, I looked up just before I fell completely flat on my face, somehow Christian had moved to being in front of me. _What the hell was he doing?_ He looked at me and smiled whilst he held my hand tightly, and somehow my nerves and anxiety disappeared and it was just the two of us. _Yes, I definitely needed Kate to set me up with someone!_


	9. Chapter 9

**Authors Note:**

 _Okay, after reading some of the comments about my last chapter, I want to make one point clear, Christian and Ana will be together, they will NOT date any other person in this story, Ana is only thinking about dating somebody else but only because of her growing feelings for Christian and she thinks he just wants to be friends with her and nothing more. The only time past relationships will be brought up is when looking back on Christian's time with his past submissives and Elena, that's it. Don't forget Ana doesn't know anything about that part of his life yet but she does find out. The next chapter is really just a filler but I needed to put it in. As a treat for you all along with the next chapter, here is a sneak peek of an upcoming chapter which will hopefully make you happy. Thanks again for reading and enjoy!_

 _Upcoming Chapter snippet:_

" _ **No, please don't cry Ana, I'm sorry, you have no idea how sorry I am that all this has happened…" he holds my face in both of his hands and wipes my tears away, he looks into my eyes like he's searching for something, and I think I know what because I want it too, I want to be with him, I want us to be together, I don't want him as just my best friend anymore. Before I can think about anything else or tell him how I feel, he kisses me.**_

 **Chapter Nine:**

 **CPOV:**

All I could think about was how beautiful Ana looked today at her graduation, she was so nervous and no matter how many times I told her she wasn't alone and she'll be fine she wouldn't listen. These past two weeks have been the best of my life, I've managed to find a real friend in Ana, probably the first friend I have ever had, at 28 years old that does sound rather pathetic but even so I won't let anything ruin it, not even Elena. The more time I spent with Ana or just even talking to her on the phone makes me realise more on just what I have been missing out on all these years.

I'm brought back to the present as Ana's name has been called up onto the stage for her to receive her degree from me. I can see it in her eyes that she's scared, probably mostly scared about falling over her gown. I decide to help her out a bit and walk over to her just as she nearly did trip over, I grab hold of her hand before she does fall, she looks up at me in shock and I just smile and squeeze her hand. I couldn't care less about the whispers in the hall it was just the two of us and I was going to help her through this. One of these days I hope she will tell me about her life in Detroit, she lived there until she was 18 years old so she must have had some kind of life there, I just hope it wasn't as fucked up as mine.

I walk with her as she makes her way towards the Chancellor, as she shakes his hand I resume back to my normal position and wait for her to come to me, as she turns to me a huge grin spreads across her face and I can't help but match it with my own. When she finally stands in front of me, I pass the degree over to her, I'm proud of her, it's a massive achievement. I reach for her hand again and squeeze it and before I know it she hugs me, I tense up a little, normally it's me who initiates a hug with her and she never questions it but not this time, I could to ten in my head, I can't panic here in front of hundreds of people, she reaches up and whispers _'thank you'_ in my ear ever so faintly and I swear all my fears disappear, what is she doing to me? She pulls away from me and walks away before I can say or do anything else. I have no time to over think as already the next person in line is waiting to be passed their degree, _don't even think about hugging me!_

Once that ordeal is all over, I have to find Ana but I can't see her anywhere, I can see Kate and her family but no Ana, where is she? I need to hug her again. As I make my way through the crowd of people towards Ana, I'm stopped by some girl, who this fuck is this? I then recognise her as one of the girls that was sat in front of Ana in the crowd, I know Ana was laughing at them and I think I am about to find out why.

"Mr. Grey…" she purrs, is she actually for real, I'm not remotely attracted to her.

"May I help you?" I ask sternly, I can see her swallow.

"Christian, I was just wondering if would like to join me for a drink after…" as she's talking, I finally spot Ana, straight away she spots me and her eyes grow wide when she sees who's talking to me. I decide to end this shit now in my true CEO mode. I look down at her and glare.

"First of all, its Mr. Grey to you, not Christian, second of all do you even know who I am? I don't have the time nor the energy to waste it on someone like you, whom I'm guessing all you can see from me is money. Thirdly, you see that beautiful girl over there…" I look at Ana and she follows my line of vision until she spots Ana looking at us. I carry on with my little speech.

"…that girl over there is the girl I would willingly spend all of my time with, that's the girl I want and make no mistake, that's the girl I will have, not you, are we clear?" I glare at her again, she nods and walks away, and I turn around and make my way over to Ana.

"What was that about?" she asks.

"Nothing, are you ready to go, I have a surprise for you Miss Steele?"

"Lead the way Mr. Grey"

I smile at her and we both make our way out of the hall together, but not before being stopped by Kate and her family.

"Congratulations Ana!" a woman said to Ana whom I'm guessing is Kate's mother.

"Thank you!" Ana smiled back happily, she seems in a better mood now and I'm glad.

"Steele!" who the fuck is this? And why is Ana grinning at him.

"Ethan! What are you doing here?" she happily cheered. I'm guessing they know each other well, too well for my liking, looking at them together now, I am now seriously jealous and pissed off.

"I couldn't miss my two favourite girls graduating now could I so I came to surprise you both"

"It's so good to see you…" and before I can do anything, Ana hugs him and he hugs her back and what makes it worse he picks her up and she laughs. I need to get out of here. Why can't we be like that? _Because you're completely fucked up Grey!_ Ana's voice saying my name snaps me out of my jealous rage.

"Christian, I'd like you to meet Ethan, Kate's brother, Ethan this is Christian", as she says this Ethan politely extents out his arm to shake my hand, I probably should shake his hand, you can be polite Grey, as long as he doesn't touch her again.

"Christian Grey?" this fucker Ethan asks me, I just nod and don't answer. Ethan turns all his attention back to Ana.

"I'm home for a couple of weeks Steele, why don't we go out for dinner and catch up?" he asks her, is he fucking kidding me, back off she's mine! _No she's not Grey!_

"I'd love to Ethan, I'm sorry to cut this short but me and Christian were just leaving, I'll call you though…" no you won't Ana, not if I have anything to do with it. I firmly place my arm around Ana's waist as she say our goodbyes and leave. I need to get out of here, I feel like I can't breathe.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten:**

Christian all but dragged me out of the graduation hall… _where the hell are we going?_ He hadn't spoken a word to me since we left Ethan, maybe that was his problem, probably not, we are just friends, that's it, he doesn't feel anything more than friendship towards me, unlike my feelings towards him which were growing stronger each day. We got to his car and again without saying a word he opened up the passenger door for me to get in, I did and he shut it again. I only waited a few more seconds before he opened up the driver's side and he slid in himself, I was becoming more impatient by the minute, why wasn't he talking to me?

"What's with the silent treatment Christian?" I asked him, he didn't answer. _Great…silent treatment it is._ I continued to stare out the window and watched the outdoors pass us by, it wasn't a short while later that I realised we are leaving Portland behind us, it looked like we were heading for Seattle.

"Christian, where are we going? If you are planning on kidnapping me and then killing me at least give me some kind of warning, this silent treatment is beginning to piss me off!" I huffed at him, I looked over at him and I finally saw a small smirk playing on his lips.

"Well…" I demanded, finally he took a deep breath and started talking.

"I realised something, you've never seen my apartment, that's where we are going, and plus your surprise is there waiting for you".

"What surprise?"

"It's a surprise for a reason Ana, you have to wait and see..."

"But..." I started to protest but he interrupted me.

"And as for the silent treatment, I will let you figure that out on your own"

"What does that mean? I haven't done anything, in fact I know I haven't, so this must be your problem, not mine Grey!"

"Don't I know it..." he all but muttered to himself probably hoping I didn't hear, but I did.

We didn't talk for the rest of our journey, it had begun to rain quite heavily outside so I just and stared outside the window watching the rain fall hard against the windows of the car thinking about what he'd said to me. As we reached the outskirts of Seattle, it looked like a storm was coming, the rain had picked up aggressively and was bouncing off the rooftop of the car, I could also hear the howling of the wind around us. Christian drove us through the streets of Seattle, I should probably ask him if he could show me around at some point in the near future as I was moving here with Kate soon to join the real world, we just had to wait first for her Dad to find us an apartment to live in. I was so busy thinking inside my own head that I hadn't realised we had slowed down and turned into an underground parking lot. I waited for Christian to pull up and turn the engine off before turning to face him, he turned to face me and smiled slightly, but even I knew that smile was off. He then proceeded to get out of the car and I did the same. I looked around me, Audi's everywhere. I hadn't noticed Christian had come to stand at the side of me, he followed my vision until he realised what I was looking at.

"All mine..." he whispered softly.

"All of them? Why?"

"Because I can…" I rolled my eyes at him, that's not an answer, he once again glared at me for rolling my eyes. I looked around again until I spotted a car that could only be described as 'every boys dream'. I looked up at him and I saw him smirking proudly.

"It's an Audi R8 Spyder" he answered my question even though I hadn't actually asked him anything.

"Let me guess, because you can?" I said mocking his last words to me, before he could reply, I spoke again.

"Why didn't you drive that today instead?"

"I wanted to blend in" he said simply.

"Blend in? Christian, you're a billionaire, you are known all across the US, you can't blend in" I said sarcastically.

"I can at least try..." he responded sharply. Without saying a word, he took hold of my hand and dragged me through the parking lot towards the elevators. We stood in silence and waited for the elevator to arrive, it felt like hours but even though in reality we only waited a few seconds, the elevator arrived and we both stepped in, him typing in a code and then the button to the penthouse, another _'because I can….'_ I'm guessing. Still not saying a word, we stood in silence as the elevator door closed behind us and we started our journey up to his penthouse. All of a sudden, completely out of nowhere a feeling spread through my entire body, a feeling of anticipation, an electrical charged, exhilarating feeling of anticipation. I shuffled back on my feet, out of sight of Christian who just stood there as though nothing was happening, I needed to get over these feelings I had for Christian, and they were driving me crazy. Finally, the elevator stopped and opened, we had arrived at his penthouse.

"Wow…" was all I could say. This place was spectacular, and huge, seriously huge.

"Christian, this place is incredible, how come you didn't bring me here sooner?" I asked excitedly, he chuckled slightly at my excitement. I notice the grand piano sitting in a very wide open space.

"You never told me you could play the piano..." I skipped over to it, he followed me.

"I started playing when I was six years old"

"Can you play something for me?" I asked.

"Later, first we have dinner then your surprise..." he winked at me and took hold of my hand as we turned our backs on the piano and towards the kitchen. As I sat on a bar stool, he went to the fridge and took out a bottle of champagne.

"Celebrating?" I asked.

"Yes, your graduation Miss Steele, I believe that deserves champagne" I grinned at him.

"Thank you again for today Christian, you helped me a lot"

"Ana I would do anything for you just to see that smile and hear that giggle" he said simply as he reached for two champagne flutes, I just stared at him without saying a word. He popped open the champagne, filled up my champagne flute and passed it over to me.

"Congratulations on your degree Miss Steele…"

"Thank you Mr. Grey…" we stared at each other whilst we both took a sip. Before either of us could say or do anything, Taylor appeared behind Christian, Christian noticed my eyes move to look behind him and he too tuned to look.

"Sir, Mrs. Lincoln is on her way up" I hadn't a clue who she was but I saw Christian instantly freeze at the sound of that name.

"Thank you Taylor" was all he said, Taylor nodded and left us both.

"Christian, what's wrong?" he was still completely frozen to the spot. Before I could carry on speaking to him, I heard the elevator ping open and the sound of heels coming towards us.

"Just, please…stay with me" Christian whispered to me quickly, almost pleading with me, I looked up at him confused, his eyes were dark, almost black, before I could answer him, a voice I then recognised spoke. Elena, Elena was Mrs. Lincoln, now Christian's reaction made sense.

"I didn't realise you had company Christian…" she said coldly, looking right at me.

"What are you doing here Elena?"

"I want to talk Christian, we have a lot to discuss, wouldn't you agree?" she replied without taking her eyes off me.

"You can call me..."

"You ignore my calls Christian, I decided to show up unannounced so we could talk face-to-face"

"I've been busy…"

"I can see that darling…" the way she said 'darling' to him made my skin crawl, I was beginning to think they both had a past with each other, but she was probably twice his age, that surely can't be right. I watched as she walked over to our champagne.

"Celebrating are we?" she asked, looking at me again, I answered her this time, Christian's silence was beginning to frustrate me.

"Yes we are" I told her coldly, Christian stiffened at the side of me, she however just glared at me, and apparently me answering wasn't the best idea.

"You do not speak to me unless I tell you otherwise" she told me. _What?_

"Elena…" Christian began.

"Christian, surely she knows not to speak to me, surely she knows the rules?" _What rules?_ When Christian doesn't answer her, she gasps.

"Christian, surely you've explained our lifestyle to her, if she's to become one of your…"

"DON'T! Elena, don't you dare finish that sentence!" Christian shouted, making me jump.

"She doesn't know?" Elena gasps.

"Know what?" I speak up, this was really confusing. Elena glares at me again for speaking, but I didn't care, I wanted to know what they were talking about. Christian turns to me and whispers quietly...

"Don't leave Ana, please…" why would I leave, what's he trying to tell me, or not tell me by the sounds of it.

"Is precious Ana here not your submissive Christian?" Elena speaks out. _Submissive?_ _What?_ Christian freezes at the side of me. I look at her Elena's face, I can tell she looks pleased with herself.

"What…what does she mean Christian?" I ask him quietly.

"And she calls you Christian…" Elena continues on, well why wouldn't I?

"You do not call him Christian, you call him Sir…" she tells me, I've had enough of this.

"I don't think so! I don't know what the hell you are talking about and to be honest I really don't care, but you've interrupted our evening and I…"

"How dare you speak to me like that? Christian, you better talk to this one here and pull her in line or she'll suffer the consequences…"

"Are you threatening me?" I glare at her. Christian grabs hold of me and turns me to face him.

"Ana, please…don't, just let me handle it"

"I don't see you handling it very well Christian, I won't leave but I would like an explanation" I shout at him, once again, Elena speaks.

"You do not talk to your Dominant like that Miss Steele" she shouts at me. _Dominant?_

"Elena, that's enough, you've said enough and you've done enough, please get the fuck out of my apartment before I throw you out!" Christian finally speaks up.

"She deserves to know the truth Christian, she deserves to know how truly fucked up you are, does she know that you like to fuck, whip, cane, torture pretty brown haired girls like her for your own pleasure and enjoyment…" my stomach drops, and I suddenly feel physically sick. _Please no…_

"ENOUGH!" Christian screams at her. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY APARTMENT ELENA!" She looks at me with a satisfied smile on her face, hearing the screaming, Taylor has appeared behind her, without another word she turns around and leaves, Taylor follows her out. Christian just stands there, watching her leave, and even after she's gone, he still stands and stares at the exact same spot, I can see that's he shaking with rag. I try to talk but I can't find the words I want to say, he eventually turns around and looks at me, immediately I back away from him.

"Is it true?" I croak! _Please say no, please say no!_...


	11. Chapter 11

**Authors Note:**

 _Thank you so much for all your comments, here's the next chapter for you. The next couple of chapters will be quite emotional and you will find out near enough everything about Ana's past and more on Christian's, I am leaving out one little slight detail but you will find out about that soon enough. I hope you enjoy and thank you again for reading!_

 **Chapter Eleven:**

I've read about the Dominant/Submissive lifestyle before, and I know some of what it entails but I never thought I would find myself in a situation like this. I look at Christian and wait for him to answer but he doesn't, somehow I know that everything Elena said was and is true, my eyes plead with his to tell me otherwise but he just looks away. I decide I can't handle his silence anymore and I begin talking:

"I said I wouldn't leave Christian, but you owe me an explanation and a good one, if you don't then I will leave and I won't come back" Christian's head snapped back to look at me as I spoke, he took a step closer to be and I took a step back, his eyes widened.

"I won't hurt you…" he whispered, his voice broke as he said it.

"It doesn't matter Christian, I deserve to know who you really are seeing as though I don't know you at all"

"No Ana you do know me, you do"

"Well then start talking Christian…"

"I can't…"

"Why not?"

"Because you will still leave me…"

"Christian, I will walk out of this apartment if you don't start talking…"

"Ana, please, I never wanted you to find out this way, eventually I was going to tell you this but I didn't want you leaving so I avoided it as much as I could..."

"Well it looks like your friend did it for you" he stiffened up at the slight mention of her.

"Who is she Christian? Who is she to you? Do you have a past together, are you together now?" he doesn't answer.

"DAMN IT CHRISTIAN, TELL ME!" I scream at him.

"YES OKAY YES ANA! Everything she said is true but please, it's not me anymore, you have to believe me, ever since I met you…"

"Since you met me, we've known each other probably less than a month, how can you possibly decide to suddenly change your lifestyle just because of meeting me, that's bullshit Christian!"

"No Ana it's not, you don't understand…"

"Then make me understand!" I watch him closely, he takes a deep breath and continues.

"Ok, I'll tell you everything, but please don't leave. I know you probably will after I've finished but…"

"Just tell me Christian" he nods and leads me over back to the bar stools in the kitchen, I sit down and wait for him to start talking, whilst grabbing my champagne then putting it back again realising drinking champagne probably wasn't the best idea at this moment, I had a feeling this definitely wasn't going to be a cheerful conversation. He doesn't sit down next to me, he stays standing, far enough away from me.

"Ok, what she said was true, every bit of it, although I do wish it hadn't come out like that. I was a Dominant, have been since I was 21 years old. A year ago I decided I didn't want to be in that kind of lifestyle anymore so I tried to leave it all behind and move on with my life, at first I was fine but then the stress of my job got the better of me and I needed a release, it's the only way I've ever known. Then I met you…you stumbling into my office changed my life, more than you know. Elena was right too, I don't have any friends, I don't have time for friends, my brother and sister don't count. My job meant that I sacrificed a lot in order for me to achieve what I have, I kept everyone including my parents, my brother and sister at a safe distance, they hardly ever see me and when they do it's for an hour at the most before I find excuses to leave again and head back to work. You're the first real friend I have ever had, and I didn't want to lose that by telling you about my fucked up life. I swear to you Ana, I would have told you eventually, we've only known each other a short while and I didn't think you would be ready to hear it…"

"When we first met, did you see us as friends?" he takes a deep breath.

"No, I didn't, but I didn't see you as my submissive either. I didn't know what I saw but I knew I had to see you again, I couldn't get you out of my head. So when my brother planned his stag do around Portland, I grabbed at the chance to see you…"

"You wasn't in the club by accident was you? You knew I worked there?"

"Yes I did but I didn't know you would be working that night, which was by chance"

"How did you know where I worked?" I saw him hesitate slightly.

"I ran a background check on you, I had to Ana, I had to see you"

"YOU WHAT? You had no right invading my privacy like that Christian"

"I didn't have much of a choice Ana, I didn't know how else to find you, you've called me a control freak enough times, well that's true, I need control, I have to have it"

"Why?"

"I just do Ana"

"But why do you? What's Elena got to do with all of this?"

"She's a family friend, she's been a friend of my Mothers for years…"

"But what does that have…wait? Was she one of your submissives?" _Please say no…_

"I was hers, for six years" _What?_

"Six years? SIX YEARS?! But that would make you fifteen years old Christian, that's child abuse!"

"Ana it wasn't, I asked for it, I needed it. I was an out of control teenager, drink, drugs whatever it was it didn't matter, I needed help…"

"HELP? You call all this help? It's child abuse and you need to admit that right now"

"No Ana it wasn't child abuse!"

"YES IT WAS!" I screamed at him. I couldn't control my anger anymore, I was going to make him admit this.

"Ana please, you just don't understand…" I slapped him hard across the face, he didn't just say that to me.

"Don't you dare tell me I don't understand what abuse is Christian, DON'T YOU EVEN DARE!" I screamed at him, by this point I had tears pouring down my cheeks. I must have slapped him with some force as there's already a hand print across his face, when he looked at me, his stare was deathly cold.

"What do you mean Ana?" I needed to control my anger, taking a deep breath.

"This conversation isn't about me, it's about you, it's about you admitting that was she did when you was fifteen was child abuse. I can see it all clearly now, she's still controlling your life, you have no friends, hardly any contact with your family, that's all her Christian, she made it that way so she could control every bit of your life".

"How come you don't have a family Ana?"

"That's none of your fucking business Christian, don't you dare turn this around and start asking questions about my fucked up life, you don't have the right since you clearly can't see what abuse is"

"Ana, it wasn't abuse when I asked for it"

"It doesn't matter, you was fifteen years old, you was a child, a fucking child Christian, and she needs to be stopped…" I moved towards the elevator but he grabbed hold of me roughly, I winced.

"ANA! Don't you fucking dare walk out of here and go looking for her" his hold on me tightened and it began to hurt as I began to panic.

"Christian…please, let go of me" I whimpered quietly, he looked at my face and let go of me immediately, straight away I moved away from him.

"Ana, I'm sorry, I would never hurt you, please believe me…"

"You are already hurting me Christian, I don't know how I can make you see it, and you are so blind by her twisted little games…"

"Ana, please…"

"Don't, I don't know what to say to you, you have to figure this out by yourself, whatever I say is not going to get you to understand"

"You are leaving?" he asked desperately.

"I don't want to leave you, but I can't stay here with you either knowing all this, I need time to think. Christian, you've become like my best friend, I can't stand the thought of someone hurting you in anyway, I would do anything to stop that from happening but I'm too late for all of that"

"Ana, I'm the same man you met"

"No, you are a completely different person to me now, to the whole world you are the CEO, the in control, confident, extremely smart man who could take on anyone that ever came across him. But to me, I see a small boy terrified of admitting the truth, scared of admitting what he has known all along. Whether you admit or not, you was abused, you was only fifteen years old Christian, that's classed as abuse". I needed some time to think, I knew already that I was going to come back to him, he's become the most important person in my life and I would do anything to protect him and keep him safe but he needed time alone.

"I need some time to think, I need some fresh air, I'll come back Christian but I need to feel like I can breathe because right now it feels like I'm suffocating…" he didn't answer, he didn't look at me, he didn't even stop me from walking away. Before I got very far, I heard him whisper and what he said stopped me dead in my tracks.

"I was born in Detroit Ana…"


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve:**

"What?" I turned around to face him, he was now sat down on the bar stood with his head in his hands. I walk back over to him and stand next to him. He didn't answer my question, I didn't expect him to either, he knew that I knew exactly what he'd said.

"You was born in Detroit?! I asked anyway, he just nodded his head still in his hands. Eventually he spoke but not what I expected to hear.

"Ana, I know what abuse is, I know what neglect is, I lived it, I lived through hell until I was four years old…" he muttered quietly, almost hoping I wouldn't hear him. I moved to the other side of him and sat down next to him, in this moment all I wanted to do was hold on to him… _so it's not just me after all._

"My birth mother was a crack whore, a prostitute, I don't remember much of her, I do remember her pimp though, and I see him every night, inside my own head…" tears are falling from eyes fast, I lean over to touch his chest but in one swift move he grasps my hand tightly.

"Don't…." he pleads with me. He finally looks up at me, his eyes dark, almost black and full of fear.

"Talk to me Christian…"

"Ana, you don't want this fucked up shit instead your head so drop it"

"No, I won't, you don't tell me this and then tell me to fucking drop it!" suddenly he grabs hold of one of the champagne flute and throws it across the kitchen until it smashes dramatically against the wall and then he's on his feet.

"ANA! JUST FUCKING DROP IT OKAY!" he screams at me.

"YOU KNOW WHAT, FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU CHRISTIAN! YOU CAN'T JUST SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO ME AND THEN EXPECT ME TO DROP IT! I CAN'T AND I WON'T! YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO'S HAD A FUCKED UP LIFE! YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY I DON'T HAVE A FAMILY, I RAN AWAY WHEN I WAS 13 YEARS OLD, AS SOON AS I COULD I CHANGED MY FUCKING NAME! GUESS WHAT GREY! ANASTASIA STEELE IS NOT EVEN MY REAL FUCKING NAME! LOOKS LIKE I ALSO KEEP SECRETS…." I scream back at him, before he speaks I start again.

"…AND DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT ASKING WHAT MY REAL NAME IS BECAUSE YOU DON'T FUCKING DESERVE TO KNOW!" I don't know what makes me, but I run and I just keep running. _I really should not have told him that…_ I don't know how but I've made it to the foyer of his building, he's not even coming after me, why would he now anyway? Our friendship is probably well and truly over. I make my way outside and breathe in the fresh air, I have absolutely no idea where I am or how to get home. I look around and decide to start walking. I don't care where, I just start walking.

I don't know how much time has passed but eventually I come across a bar, having still not figured out how I am going to get home or if I just go back and face Christian I decide to go and sit inside, I have no money with me, I don't have my phone, I'm still in my graduation dress and with it becoming early evening, it's getting cooler and the wind is picking but I don't care, I need time alone. I find an empty table by the window and I make my way over and sit down, there's already strangers looking at me, probably looking at my tear stricken face. I close my eyes and try to relax but it's not really working, I want to go back to Christian but the stubborn side of me won't let me, I can't, not yet, we both need to calm down. Thinking about it now, I don't think I should have left, I promised I wouldn't, he probably freaking out that I've left my phone, purse, jacket everything with him, if he tried to find me now, he wouldn't know where to look and I have no idea where I am and didn't pay any attention as to where I was walking so trying to find his apartment building again would be difficult as I never looked at what it looked like.

"Excuse me Miss?" I groaned, why can't I be left alone. I look up to find a middle aged man looking at me, he has a name tag so I'm assuming he works here, I don't say anything, I just wait for him to continue.

"A drink for you Miss, from the man at the far side of the bar" he says as he puts my drink down, I can almost smell the alcohol in it from where I'm sitting. I look over in the direction he says and there's a young man sat there staring at me, once I make eye contact with him he raises his drink to me, I don't do anything, I just look away from him but it's too late, from the corner of my eye I can already see him making his way over to me. In a matter of seconds he's stood in front of me, sighing I look up and make eye contact with him. He's got reddish hair tied up in a ponytail with small silver hooped earrings in both ears, he looks at me with very dark blue eyes. I recognise him from somewhere but I can't think where from.

"May I join you? You look like you could use the company?" before I can even say no, he sits down across from me.

"Tell me, why are you here alone?" Because I want to be and my best friend is a jackass although right now I would rather be arguing with that said jackass than sitting here talking to you.

"I'm not alone, I'm waiting for someone" I lie, he doesn't need to know anything.

"Really? You look upset about something and you shouldn't be alone, I'll wait with you"

"That's really not necessary, I'm fine here on my own but thank you"

"Upset, drinking alcohol on your own, that's not a good combination, sometimes you can make bad decisions"

"I'm not upset and no offense but you did buy me this drink, a drink I didn't want"

"You need it" if ever Christian decided to come and find me, now would be good.

"So tell me, what's your name?" he asks me.

"Ana" I reply.

"Ana, nice to meet you Ana, I'm Jack"

"Ana?" a strong, soft voice I would recognise anywhere came from behind me, I turned around and find Christian standing there and Taylor standing behind him. They both looked like they had been running and Christian's eyes looked red and tired, straight away I stand up and run to him, he immediately pulls me into his arms and hold me tightly. I can sense Jack behind me so I pull out of Christian's arms slightly and turn around, Christian stands very close to my side, I look at Jack's face and he looks very angry.

"Jack, it was nice to meet you" I say simply, his eyes dart to mine.

"This is who you was waiting for?" do they know each other? I look up at Christians face, I can tell he has no idea who Jack is, I couldn't say the same for Jack though, he definitely knows Christian from somewhere.

"Yes…" before I can continue, Christian speaks, his voice sharp and clear.

"Thanks for keeping her company but we have plans and must be leaving now," plans meaning more arguing and screaming at each other. Before I can do or say anything else, Christian drags me out of the bar with Taylor not very far behind us, I look back into the bar and Jack is just glaring at us.

"Are you okay?" Christians asks quietly.

"Yes, thank you for coming to find me and I'm sorry…"

"I don't want to hear it, we are going to go back to Escala and talk properly without screaming at each other"

"Okay" I say quietly, I'm not sure if this is such a good idea but right now, I know I shouldn't argue with him.

Once we got back to Escala, we both make our way to the large sitting area and sit down next each other, I don't think either of us want to start talking just in case we end up screaming at each other. I decide I can't sit in silence anymore and turn to face him.

"I'm sorry I ran off, I just needed some fresh air, I was coming back but once I started walking I couldn't figure out where I was so…" I look down so I can't see his face.

"Just don't do it again Ana"

"Okay" we both fall into silence again, I look up at him again, he's staring at me and then he starts talking.

"I've never had to explain my past to anymore Ana and if someone tries to ask I shut them down completely but with you, I want to everything about you, I want to know what you meant earlier but I know you have got to start trusting me first and me screaming at you and throwing things across the room is not a very good start. But I do want you to know that you've changed my life, whether you realise it or not and I thank you for that, in fact I don't think I'll be able to stop thanking you…" he pauses looking at my reaction before taking a deep breath and carrying on.

"I was born in Detroit, my birth Mother was a crack addict and a prostitute, we had nothing, no food, nothing. The only thing I remember having is a small teddy and a little train set, that's it. She however, had a pimp and strings of men coming in and out of our home constantly. Her pimp hated me, I was a little boy and he hated me more than anything else in his life, I will never forget his face. He used to kick me, throw me across the room when I was in his way, he…he used me as his ashtray…and my fucked up Mother did nothing to stop it from happening, she was too busy trying to find her next fix. In the end, she killed herself when I was four years old, her pimp found us and blamed me, he left us there, and he left me there for days with my own Mother's dead body. I was starving, I was beaten and in agony. Eventually though, we were found and I was taken to hospital, that's how Grace found me…" he stops talking completely and the tears are pouring down my face. I don't say anything, I don't know if I can, I'll break down further, surprisingly, he carries on talking.

"…I don't like to be touched, if someone touches me I immediately go back to that place, I have burns and several scars on my chest and back, I can't bare it, the pain I feel is too much to bare, my own family don't touch me, they never have" he stops again and puts his face in his hands, I can't believe he's told me all this, and somehow now, the little things he's done or said start to make more sense. I try to stop crying but the tears continue to fall, I move and kneel down in front of him and pry his hands away from his face, he lets me, and looks at me, my own tear stricken face matching his, all I want to do is hold him in my arms and keep him safe, safe from everything. We just stare at each other whilst holding each other's hands tightly. Eventually he pulls me up and sits me back down on the sofa next to him but still keeps hold of my hand. I guess it's my turn to start talking, taking a deep breath, I begin.

"Christian, I won't do anything to hurt you, you have to know that. I can only imagine that pain you feel and in some ways I know how you feel, what I am about to tell you, I have never told anyone, not even Kate. She knows I ran away from home but that's it. I trust you with my life Christian and you mean the absolute world to me, just promise to keep calm and be patient with me…" he stares at me for a few seconds before leaning over and kisses my forehead and whispering "I promise…"


	13. Chapter 13

**Authors Note:**

 _So here it is, Ana's story. I kept changing the way I wrote this but I finally decided on this version and I hope I did it justice. Thank you again for reading!_

 **Chapter Thirteen:**

 **CPOV:**

I can't believe how the last few hours have played out, looking at my watch and realising it's almost 2am I look at the most beautiful girl in the world fast asleep next to me. If I look closely I can still see the tear stains on her face, I realise now just how much she means to me and how I would willingly do anything for her. When Elena appeared unannounced and told Ana about my fucked up life, I was convinced Ana would walk out even after I asked or more like pleaded with her to stay and she did at first, she stayed and asked for an explanation from me, I was unwilling to give her one, I didn't want her to have all this shit inside of her own head but being the true Ana she is she kept on pushing and pushing me until I finally snapped. We argued, we screamed at each other, I threw things across the room! _Fuck!_ She even slapped me across the face but I can't say I didn't deserve that, I didn't want to admit to myself the true nature of Elena's fucked up ways, I was a fully grown man, it would be weak if I admitted it especially to Ana and with that she did walk out and I did nothing to stop her. I don't how long I stood there after she walked out, Taylor soon snapped me out of it though and I realised I was crying, I don't cry, ever. I knew then I needed to go after her so that's what I did, first I tried calling her phone only to then hear it ringing, I ran out of the penthouse as fast as I could, she had no money, no phone, no jacket to keep herself warm, I couldn't even begin to think about what could happen to her. With Taylor following me, I ran out of Escala and onto the streets, I took a lucky guess in which way I went and I thank god it was the right one, I eventually find her sat in a bar, straight away I move but stop when I see someone approaching her, Taylor stands at the side of me making sure I don't do anything completely fucking stupid, this guy is only talking to her and I want to rip his throat out and beat the shit out of him. Taking a few deep breaths I walk inside, she doesn't see me, her back is to me and I call her name. As soon as I did, she immediately turned around and ran to me and I willingly tucked her into my arms. _She was safe._

But looking at her now, I realise she's not safe, she's far from it, she's running, she's been running all her life, even since she ran away from home when she was thirteen. I reach out and stroke her cheek with my fingertips, a slight smile plays across her face, I lean over and kiss her on the forehead and think back to our conversation earlier.

" _I promise…" I tell her and wait for her to start talking. I watch her and she takes in deep breaths before starting._

" _When I was kid, I thought I had the perfect family, I had two loving parents, I was always a Daddy's girl, as a small girl he was my best friend, my hero no matter what anyone said about him. When I was five, he was murdered and left me and my Mother all alone, we didn't have much money, we got by as best we could. It wasn't long, possibly only a couple of months before we found out my Dad had another life, a life he'd kept secret from us both, I'm guessing to protect us I'm not really sure. He'd gotten in deep with some kind of gang, he'd gotten in so deep he couldn't find a way out, his way out was death but he left us behind. The gang he was involved with bought, sold traded drugs, heroin, cocaine, whatever it was they had it, they had guns too to protect themselves. I don't know how they found us, but they did, by this point my Mother had begun to hate me, I was only five and she started to blame me for everything, my Dad's death especially I couldn't really think for myself or speak up for myself at that age so I just took it. When this gang did find us, we were took hostage, I was a hostage until I was thirteen years old, apparently it was all part of us paying our debt…" she pauses for a moment and looks at me, I squeeze her hand tightly to encourage her to carry on._

"… _I think the only good thing they ever let me do was go to school, but I was followed, I was followed everywhere I went just in case I tried to run away. I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone, I wasn't allowed to make any friends. That was my life, my Mother had turned against me, I was on my own at this point, from the age of five I was completely on my own. If I did something wrong, well actually even if didn't, I would be beaten, burnt, kicked in the stomach, tied up for days without any food, only the tiniest bit of water to keep my alive, I was in and out of the hospital several times. My Mother took me to the hospital, she made up all sorts of stories to the doctors about my injuries and they never questioned it because the doctors I would see were all part of the gang and money talked, it talked a lot." I pull her closer to me, I want to say so much but the look on her face tells me to keep quiet, she needs to get this all out in the open._

"… _When I turned nine years old, things changed, things changed dramatically. My Mother was getting married, she was getting married to the leader of the gang, she was so hooked up on drugs, she hated her own daughter for no reason. I tried to convince her she can't marry him, but for that I would be starved for days, my own Mother would do that to me, at only nine years old I was slowly beginning to hate her. Once they got married, they both disappeared for a few weeks, I was locked in the basement of this house, no light, nothing. I wasn't allowed to go to school for those few weeks, the only time I would see anyone was when someone brought me food. When they came back, things changed again. I was allowed my own bedroom, apparently my new Step-Father wanted me closer to them so I couldn't escape. I'd gone back to school, if I failed one test or one homework I would be punished severely. One night, I was in my bedroom and my Step-Father came into my room, he'd never been near me up until that point, he told me I was to be given a job, a job that would help him out a lot and make him a lot of money, I was to be a part of his drugs trade, I was forced to help him sell drugs to people at nine years old, I wasn't playing out in the streets with my friends, no I was trapped in hell. I couldn't do it, after the stuff I'd seen, I was smart, I knew it was wrong so I refused and refused and refused…my Step-Father got angry with me so he beat me so bad I almost died whilst my own Mother watched him do it…" she starts shaking and tears start to form in her eyes, I pull her closer still, I realise that what's she's already told me is nothing in comparison to what's she about to tell me. I squeeze her tightly trying to emit some strength into her, she takes deep breaths whilst I hold her and she carries on._

"… _On my tenth birthday, my Step-Father came into my bedroom and sat down next to me, I was terrified of him so I didn't look at him. At first all he did was stroke my leg or my arm, he told me it would be our little secret as I was now his special little girl. He would come into my room almost every night after that, I tried several times to get him away from me…I tried everything, I would even injure myself so I would be taken to the hospital, anything really to keep him away, it didn't work. From my tenth birthday up until I was thirteen he would come into my room and…" she stops completely, probably because she feels me physically shaking next to her, I want to kill him. I look up at her and see tears pouring down her face. I don't think I can hear anymore but I know this is not the end of this story._

"… _He always made comments about the way I looked, about how I was developing as a young girl, it made me feel physically sick and on many occasions I was violently sick. He'd gotten over stroking my leg or arm, he now touched my breasts or put his hand up my thigh, unbuttoned my jeans and touched me, he never kissed me though. He told me he would stop if I started working for him but I didn't want to give up school, I loved it, I loved books, I loved reading. He told me I didn't have too, he didn't want me for what he originally wanted me for anyway, at first I didn't understand what he meant and because I was so scared I said I would, I'd do anything if it meant he would stop. He did stop for a while, but it soon became clear about what my job was, at just past eleven years old I was there to please other men, I was there for them to look at, to touch and in return I got food or water…" she's crying uncontrollably and I pull her onto my lap and let her cry and cry. I tell her to stop, she doesn't have to carry on, I couldn't stand seeing her like this. She insisted in carrying on, she wanted me know, she wanted to get it out. I keep her on my lap as she starts talking again._

" _By the time I was thirteen, I'd given up, I wanted to end my life, I wanted out. I hated my Mother, I hated my Dad for leaving me, my Mother knew exactly what was going on because she sometimes watched but she was too drugged up to realise I was her own daughter. On my thirteenth birthday, I made a pact with myself, I either got out now, not caring how or end my own life, if I couldn't get out , I would not live another day, I refused. That night, my Step-Father came into my room and locked the door behind him. He actually put a pack of condoms on my bed, I knew what was about to happen, before I could do anything, he pinned me down on the bed, I was small, very thin and weak there was no way of fighting him off…he ripped off my top and unbuttoned my jeans whilst all I did was scream but nobody cared. He took off my bra and began touching me, he bit me, scratched me, the more I screamed the more he would do it. I can't really explain how I did it, but the bed side lamp was a perfect weapon, I screamed more and more to distract him, it worked and I managed to get hold of it and I hit him over the side of the head…it worked, I knew I hadn't killed him, but I had knocked him out, he fell on the floor, I knew I had minutes to make my escape, I grabbed hold of my t-shirt and a jumper and ran, I ran as fast as I could…on my way out I saw a gun, I took it, I got out, I'd escaped hell…" I notice she's not crying anymore, unlike myself, tears are pouring down my face and I can't stop them. She looks up at me and wipes them away with her hand, I don't know why but I kiss her lightly on the lips, once I've pulled away, she tucks herself under my chin, and holds onto me tightly._

" _Even though I'd escaped one hell, I knew I'd be facing another, I had no money, no phone, no friends to call, all I had was a gun, I was once again completely on my own in the middle of Detroit. I walked and walked until I couldn't move anymore, I found a dark, dirty alleyway and found somewhere in the dark to sit down, I didn't even cry, I didn't do anything, I found some newspaper and whatever else I could find and made a make-shift bed, I fell asleep eventually, I woke up the next morning and realised what had happened the night before and then realised again that I was free, all I had to do was keep it that way. I think I stayed there for a couple more days before hunger got the better of me. I was never found, for three years I lived on the streets, I'd made friends whilst on the streets, they taught me how to survive, how to get money, basically how to steal from people. I was now sixteen years old, I was still pale, very thin but I'd become stronger, I was tougher, I wasn't going to let anyone take my freedom away from me. I was walking down the street one day when I spotted my Mother, she didn't see me, I only saw her for a couple of seconds before I disappeared, that was the last time I ever saw her. I realised in that moment, they all needed to be stopped, including her. I went to the police station and told them everything, absolutely everything. Because I'd been kept hostage for so long, I gave them names, addresses, everything I knew about the gang. One police man, I think his name was Ray helped me, believed me, and made sure I would never be found, he was nice. He said my best option would for me to be put into witness protection but I couldn't do it, all I asked for was advice on where to go to change my name and some money to get me out of Detroit for good, and that is how I ended up here, I still have that gun though…" I don't say anything, I don't need to either, she knows I'm here and she knows I won't go anywhere. Her breathing has changed and I know she has fallen asleep in my arms, gently I stand up with her safely in my arms, I am never letting her go. I carry her through my penthouse and into my bedroom and lie her down gently, not wanting to wake her up, she's exhausted and to be honest so am I. I lean down and kiss her before moving away, she whispers my name and the word "stay", I make a vow right there that I will never leave her side._


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen:**

I slowly open my eyes, it's now dark outside, I know I must have fallen asleep at some point, telling Christian about my past wore me out, I feel exhausted but I also feel like a weight has been lifted, I know I can trust him, I trust him with my life, I know he will keep me safe no matter what. I sit up and look around, I realise I'm in a bedroom, Christian's bedroom I think but where is he? I look at the alarm clock that's on the bed side table, it reads 4am. I know I should probably go back to sleep but first I need to find him, after everything we've both revealed to each other, I need to know he's okay. I quickly get out of bed, it's then when I hear a piano playing in the distance, I know it's him, he's playing a piece so sad and lonely, my heart breaks for him, he's always there for me, I should stop running away and let myself be there for him. I make my way out of his bedroom and back through his penthouse, I spot him straight away sitting at his piano, he plays beautifully much like the beautiful man I know he is, inside and out. I move closer to him and it's then when I must be catch the corner of his eye as he looks up at me, our eyes lock immediately. He looks so sad and exhausted, I quickly walk over to him still not breaking eye contact and sit down next to him, and straight away he stops playing.

"Why did you stop? That was beautiful…"

"I'm sorry if I woke you"

"Have you been asleep at all yet?" I ask him, he shakes his head.

"Why?"

"I don't find sleep easy, and when I do…I have nightmares. So I try and avoid going to bed as much as possible" he watches me as I reach for his hand and entwine it with my own, he sits and stares at our hands for a moment before looking up at me again. I suddenly let go out his hand for a second and stand up, he's watching me warily.

"Come on, you need some sleep" I tell him holding out my hand again.

"Ana, I'll be…"

"Fine, I know you will be but you still need sleep, come and sleep next to me" he studies me for a moment before looking at my outstretched hand then back to looking at me before taking my small hand and proceeded to stand up. Once he's fully stood up I keep hold of his hand and walk us back to his bedroom, half way there he stops me and turns me around to face him, I look up at him and into his eyes, I always found them beautiful but tonight they look incredibly beautiful, he let's go of my hand and then wraps his arms around me tightly and pulls me into his chest. I inhale his scent and close my eyes, this is home. We stand there in the middle of his penthouse in the early hours of the morning holding onto each other.

"Thank you…" I hear him whisper so softly to me.

"What for?" I whisper back.

"For coming into my life, for not walking away from me…"

"I will never walk away from you Christian, you are stuck with me"

"You promise?" he asks.

"I promise you, now come on, someone needs their beauty sleep and I am not talking about me, you look ready to drop to the floor at any moment" I grab hold of his hand again, he grasps my tiny hand in his and we both walk back to his bedroom. Once back in his bedroom I let go of his hand and make my way back to his bed, he just stands still and watches me.

"Christian, what's wrong?"

"I, I need to tell you something…"

"What is it?" I ask, he's silent for a few moments before shaking his head.

"You know what, it doesn't matter, it turns out I need my beauty sleep after all" I smile at him and then proceed to get under the duvet. My eyes are closed as soon as my head hits the pillow, I can hear him moving around before the bed dips and he slides in next to me. I turn so my back is facing him, he must think I have fallen asleep because what he does next makes my heart stop, but for a very good reason. He pulls me to him and wraps his arm around my waist and holds onto me tightly, I feel him bury his face into my neck, I want to smile and turn around to look at him so I can kiss him properly but I keep still and keep my eyes closed so I don't ruin anything.

"You are the most beautiful girl in the world Anastasia Steele and you mean the absolute world to me," he whispers so softly and so quietly into my ear. I want to tell him just how much he means to me but I don't, I have a feeling that his little confession is a secret so I'll keep it that way, instead I move my hand so it's resting on top of his and pull him to me closer, it doesn't take long before sleep takes me.

I don't know what wakes me up the next morning but I reluctantly open my eyes. The first thing I do notice is that Christian is still fast asleep with his arm wrapped around me tightly. I look at the alarm clock at my side of the bed, it's almost midday. _Shit!_ At some point I'm going to have to get up and leave, I'm working at the club tonight so I've got to get myself back to Portland and somehow I don't think this sleeping beauty next to me is going to take it well but first I'm going to make him breakfast or lunch perhaps. As slowly as I can, I peel myself out of Christian's arms and quietly leave his bedroom, I'll come back and wake him up in a little while.

I make my way out of his bedroom towards his kitchen where I stop dead in my tracks, it turns out we've got company, they don't see me because their backs are to me, I spot Taylor appear out of the corner of my eye just as he spots me, we smile at each other before I turn my attention back to Christian's guests. Two of them I don't recognise at all but the other makes my blood boil and anger rages through me! _What the fuck is Elena Lincoln doing back here!_ Before I can react, Taylor is stood at the side of me.

"Don't Miss Steele, I had no choice, that's Mr Grey's Mother she's sat with…" he pauses as my mouth pops open.

"Is Mr Grey awake yet?" I shake my head.

"I'll go and wake him up, I don't want to be seen by that evil woman" I turn and hurriedly make my way back to Christian. Once I reach his bedroom door I take a deep breath and open the door, to my surprise he's awake, the rage that was bubbling up inside of me disappears at the sight of his smile, a smile I have never seen before, I grin back at him.

"Good morning Miss Steele"

"It's no longer morning Mr. Grey…"

"True, I can't remember the last time I have ever slept that good, in fact I don't think I ever have, I guess I should thank you for that too"

"You don't have to thank me for anything Christian, but I do need to tell you something".

"What is it?"

"We've got visitors, or should I say you've got visitors, your Mom is here, along with Mrs. Lincoln" I almost feel like spitting out those last words, I look at Christians face, his beautiful smile has disappeared and now he looks pale and tense, I walk over to him so I'm standing in front of him.

"She didn't see me, neither of them did. Taylor got to me before I could go and throw her out by her hair myself, I'll stay here whilst you go…"

"No Ana, I want you to meet my Mom, she's going to love you"

"Christian I don't think I'll be able to control my anger towards…especially when you still..." he cuts me off.

"No Ana I don't, I did a hell of a lot of thinking last night, I don't want her here but my Mom doesn't know anything and it will break her if she ever found out. Please Ana, I want my Mom to meet you"

"Okay, I trust you Christian"

"Good" he whispers before kissing my forehead. Before I can even think about changing my mind he drags me out with him towards his Mom and the devil herself.

 **CPOV:**

I woke up with a smile on my face, something in which I have never done. Ana wasn't here so I guessed she was in the kitchen, I looked at the time and I couldn't believe it, I don't think I have ever slept for so long, just as I get up Ana walks back in, she stops when she's me awake and out of bed. I look at her and those beautiful eyes, I swear my heart skips a beat, a heart I'll admit I thought I didn't have until Ana fell into my life but now Ana is so close into stealing that heart and making it hers but would she want it? She grins back at me which only makes me smile more, I think back to the words I whispered to her whilst she was asleep, she really is the most beautiful girl in the world. I think back to everything we confessed to each other last night and the realisation I had whilst she was sleeping, I was so angry, I was seeing red everywhere and normally when that happens I had a submissive to help me but that never entered my head last night, I realised I didn't need one anymore, I had Ana and even though we aren't together, she's still the best thing in my life. I also thought about my past with Elena, I was fifteen years old, fucking fifteen years old, I was already fucked up so she took advantage of it and made me a complete monster, a monster in which Ana wants to spend time with. I know I needed to change for her, she needs me just as much as I need her and I won't let anything ruin that.

But then I knew my mood would sour as Ana tells me Elena is in the kitchen with my Mom. I realise in that moment that I want Ana to meet my Mom, something in which I have never done before but with Elena being there also, I know Ana wouldn't be able to keep quiet, not that I want her to either but I don't want my Mom to find out about my fucked up life, it would break her heart. I plead with Ana to come and meet my Mom and she reluctantly agrees. Before she can change her mind I drag her out there to meet the woman I call my guardian angel.

We walk out together, Ana still slightly behind me, before she can even think about running away, I make my presence known.

"Mom" I say, I can feel Ana's glare at me from behind, I stifle a laugh. My Mom turns around along with Elena but I don't even acknowledge her presence. I swear I hear my Mom gasp as she spots Ana behind me. I make my way over to my Mom ignoring Elena completely and kiss her cheek as l always do.

"Aren't you going to introduce me Christian?" she scolds me, I don't even get a hello now she sees a girl standing in my penthouse.

"Yes of course" I reply as I make my way over to Ana who is still standing where I left her. I stand behind Ana and put my hands on her shoulders to move her forward slightly.

"Mom, I would like you meet Anastasia Steele, Ana this is my Mom Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey."

"It's nice to finally meet you Dr. Grey"

"There's none of that dear, call me Grace Ana" I feel myself relax as Ana grins at her. I can tell my Mom loves Ana already, I can't say the same about Elena though, I quickly glance at her and I can tell she is livid but I don't care, Ana is in my life and will be staying in life. I turn my attention back towards Ana and my Mom and see them smiling and laughing, I can hear my Mom asking Ana all sorts of questions and I can't help but smile at them, I hear her ask Ana over for dinner next weekend at their house as my sister is back from Paris, I hear Ana say yes and I can't help but smile some more, we aren't even a couple, well not yet anyway.

Ana doesn't even acknowledge Elena's presence and I'm glad, she keeps to her word and stays quiet. Soon though, my Mom along with Elena turn to leave as they head out to lunch together, they invited us both but before I could speak Ana tells her she needs to get back to Portland because she's working tonight. _What the fuck!_ I keep quiet until my Mom and Elena leave before turning to Ana.

"You're leaving?" I ask.

"No Christian I am not leaving in that sense, I am however working tonight so I do need to get back to Portland"

"It's not safe working there Ana" she rolls her eyes at me and my palm slightly twitches.

"Christian, it's my job. You know me and Kate plan on moving to Seattle soon but we first need to find a place to live so for the time being, Portland is where I live and it's where my job is, please understand this?"

"I do understand that Ana but you should not be working in a nightclub, it's not safe for a girl…" I want to ramble on at her explaining why it's not safe but she cuts me off.

"I am much tougher than I look Grey, you should know that by now" she snaps at me and with that she turns and leaves me standing there. I stand there for a few moments before going after her. I find her in my room sat on my bed with her head down. I move and sit down next to her, she doesn't look up at me at first but when she does there's tears in her eyes.

"Don't cry Ana, I'm sorry…I just want you safe and protected, I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you, you could say I'm very protective over you" I tell her as I wipe the first tear away.

"I didn't mean to snap at you, I'm sorry but you have to understand I have to go back to Portland I have to work"

"I know, I'm sorry" and I do mean it even if I don't want her working there.

"Thank you" she smiles and I smile back.

"Come on, get dressed, we'll have something to eat and I will drive you back to Portland" I say standing up.

"You will?"

"Of course I will, now come on! I'll leave you to get ready" I pull her up on her feet and then leave the room. As I leave the room I check my phone, I find I have quite a few missed calls from Elliot, I quickly ring him back whilst Ana gets ready, he answers almost straight away.

"Christian!" he shouts down the phone.

"What?"

"I've gone and done something incredibly stupid" this does not surprise me, he's known for it.

"What have you gone and done this time?" I ask him.

"I've slept with Kate!" he shouts at me and for once my brother has left me speechless.


	15. Chapter 15

**Authors Note:**

 _Thank you for all the reviews I've received over the last couple of chapters. I've had a couple of people private messaging me telling me my story sounds like every other story, I won't apologise, I've wrote this myself, I haven't stolen anybody else's ideas so if that's how you see then I suggest you stop reading and if there is a story similar to mine then I can't stop that, everybody has their own idea in their head and should be allowed to write a story. Furthermore, Christian and Ana are not together yet but they will be soon, I promise, just hang in there. I wrote this story quite a while ago I just never released it for the public to read. Over the weekend I have just finished writing Chapter 40, I publish chapters when I can and add A/N's into it. I hope you are enjoying this story and thank you again for reading!_

 **Chapter Fifteen:**

Christian finally drove his R8 back to Portland to take me home, I asked him if he would let me drive it, the look he gave me was one that would match 'over my dead body', his reason being he didn't trust any other person to drive it. Once we got to my apartment building he soon rushed off, his excuse being he had to meet up with Elliot urgently. As soon as I stepped through my apartment door, Kate was standing there dragging me through the apartment and into the kitchen, straight away I knew something was off with her, she was panicking about something.

"Out with it Kate, what's wrong?"

"I've done something incredibly stupid…how could I be so stupid?"

"What are you talking about? You're not pregnant are you?"

"WHAT?!" she screeched at me.

"Ok, so I'm guessing that's a no but what is it?"

"I've slept with someone…with Elliot!"

"Elliot...Elliot…Elliot Grey? As in Christian's brother?!" she nodded. So this is why Christian rushed off so suddenly.

"KATE! What the hell were you thinking? He's engaged, he's getting married in a couple of weeks, a wedding which you are invited to by the way and you go and decide to sleep with him! KATE!"

"I know, there's no need to shout at me, believe me that's all I've been doing since it happened…"

"How did it happen, and please spare me the details?"

"Well when you and Grey left Graduation a couple of us went out to celebrate, he was at the bar, he was alone so I went over and well one drink lead to shots and before I know it we are back here…I know it was a mistake but at the time that was the last thing on my mind…"

"He's engaged…"

"I know, but it sounds like from the conversations we've had he doesn't want to marry her and well I like him, I'll admit it I like him a lot"

"So you sleep with him?"

"Yes! OH GOD! What have I done Ana?!

"I wish I could answer that for you, you first need to talk to Elliot…" she shakes her head at me.

"I can't, I can't talk to him ever again…I need to get away from here…" she pauses and then looks at me as though she's thought of a plan.

"Let's go on holiday!"

"Are you serious?"

"Yes, it's the perfect time, we've both graduated, so I say before we move to Seattle, we go on a girls holiday!"

"Kate, we have jobs!"

"I don't anymore, I quit…"

"You quit? Why?"

"Because I don't need it, I've got a job at my Dad's newspaper waiting for me, I have enough money saved up until we move"

"Ok so you don't have a job but I do…"

"But can't you take some time off?"

"Kate I can't…"

"Yes you can, I know you've got money saved up, we don't have to be away for long, just a week in the sun before we begin our lives as adults"

"Kate…"

"Please Steele, I'll organise everything, just ask for some time off tonight and see what you can do, for me please"

"Fine, I'll ask tonight but no promises, and you better organise everything"

"I will, I promise" she grabs hold of me and hugs me tightly.

"Thank you Steele!"

"Don't thank me yet Kate"

"This is going to me awesome! Us two girls, a pool, a beach, alcohol…in fact, I'm going to look now!" I shake my head at her, there is point saying anything, she'll just shut it down. Whilst she's busy with her laptop, no doubt looking for cheap holidays I wonder off into my bedroom and text Christian:

 **I'm guessing the reason why you rushed off to meet with Elliot so suddenly has to do with my roommate? A**

 **Yes. C**

 **Is that all you've got to say? A**

 **Yes. C**

 **Well when you decide to have a normal conversation, let me know Grey! A**

 **I'll call you later! C**

I don't bother texting him back, I'll only get more one word answers. I suddenly realise just how tired I am and I also feel a headache coming on, this weekend has been exhausting already, Christian's revelation and then my revelation to him, I'm still struggling to decide how I feel about it all and how I feel about him. In the space of one night I feel we've become a lot closer, we understand a lot more about each other now, probably much more than either of us bargained for to be honest but I still have a feeling that Elena Lincoln is going to be a much bigger problem in the near future, I doubt she'll let Christian go that easy, I just hope Christian stands by the words that he said, she's out of his life, I just hope for good this time. I wonder back out of my bedroom to find Kate still with her laptop typing away furiously, I leave her to it and head for the kitchen. She soon follows me in, laptop under her arm.

"So, I have a plan…what do you think of Barbados for a week?"

"Kate, listen to me, I may I have saved up some money but I can't afford that"

"No, you don't have to, my parents are going on holiday there for three weeks and they both suggested that we should take a break and have a holiday. I said I'd talk to you but all we need to do pay for is the flight, that's it. What do you think?"

"I think you are completely crazy Kate!"

"I know but what do you think? Can you please try and get a week off work or just quit?"

"I can't just quit Kate but I will ask tonight, I promise"

"Thank you, you are the best Steele, do you think Christian will mind you not being at Elliot's wedding?" I couldn't help but notice her face drop when she mentioned his wedding.

"He can't stop me Kate although I probably wouldn't put it past him"

"You have feelings for him don't you?"

"Kate, don't…"

"You do, don't you?"

"Kate, it doesn't matter if I do, we're friends Kate, that's all he wants to be"

"Are you sure about that?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well has he ever actually said that just he wants to be friends, nothing more?"

"He doesn't have to say it Kate, I know him"

"Obviously you don't know him well enough, Steele, he has feelings for you"

"No he doesn't, we care about each other, that's it"

"Not according to Elliot, according to Elliot, Christian can never be able to take his eyes off you when you are around, he doesn't stop talking about you, he completely flipped out when you ended up in hospital when your drink was spiked, and he was beside himself. You don't act like that when you're just his friend Steele, he wants something more, whether he admits it yet or not, the question is what do you want?"

"Since when have you become so knowledgeable?"

"Since I can see that my best friend is head over heels with her other best friend she just won't admit it"

"Fine Kate you win! I like him, I like him a lot but don't you dare say anything to him don't even try…maybe I do need this holiday after all"

"YES! That's my girl! We can both clear our heads and have some fun"

"Do you promise not to say anything to him?"

"I promise you Ana, I won't but you need to tell him"

"Or I can just get over it so we can stay friends"

"Your friendship won't be ruined Steele, he'll realise just what he wants to sooner or later and what he wants is you, trust me…just hang in there"

"Hang in there, you make it sound like it's just that easy"

"It's not easy but it will be worth it"

"Ok, can we please change the subject now, do you want anything to eat before I leave for work?" she shakes her head and wonders off back through the apartment to her bedroom. I continue to make myself some dinner and then proceed to get ready for work.

As soon as I get to work I ask my manager about taking a week off so I can go on holiday with Kate, after thinking about what Kate and I talked about, I decided I wanted and needed a holiday. I didn't have to persuade my manager much, he granted me it straight away telling me I deserved a holiday after not taking one at all in all the time I worked for them. I text Kate letting her know I had time off and straight away she text me back telling me she was going to look at flights, I couldn't help but feel a little excited. Just as I was putting my phone away and head back out behind the bar Christian called me. I didn't answer it, I was at work so instead I waiting for my phone to stop ringing and then proceeded to text him quickly.

 **I'm at work now, can't talk, I hope Elliot is okay. Kate and I have booked a holiday, we both need a break. I'll talk to you tomorrow, have a good night. A.** He text back almost immediately.

 **What?! C**

I didn't have time to text him back or deal with his overprotective self so I ignored it and went back out behind the bar and back to work. It soon got extremely crowded and I felt rushed off my feet. I didn't even have the time for a break to check my phone. By the time 3am arrived I was exhausted, I just wanted to go home.

"Ana?" someone called my name behind me at the bar, I turned around and was surprised at who I saw.

"Jack…what are you doing here?" I ask him curiously. Why was he here?

"I fancied a drink…"

"Sure, what can I get you?"

"Would you like to join me?"

"I can't Jack, I'm working, thanks though!"

"A beautiful girl like you shouldn't work in a place like this"

"I happen to enjoy my job Jack"

"An English Major graduate like yourself should be…

"How did you know that's what I majored in?"

"You told me, don't you remember?"

"I…I, no sorry I don't remember" I can't remember telling him that, in fact I'm sure I didn't.

"I work in a Publishing House in Seattle, I can get you an interview if you are interested?"

"Jack, thank you but I don't think…" he cuts me off.

"Just think about it, if Publishing is what you would like to get into then I can help you, I'm an editor, I can pull a few strings and get you in, I'll help you build your career, just think about it Ana, here is my card." He gives me his card and then leaves, not even ordering a drink, I look down at it and his full name. _Jack Hyde…_

 **CPOV:**

She's not going on holiday…she's not going on holiday…she's not going on holiday! I can repeat that over and over in my head but it's not making me feel any better. I won't let her go, it's not safe for two young girls to go on holiday by themselves, especially Ana with Kate. Kate will more than likely get Ana drunk at every opportunity she gets and Ana will just go along with it putting herself a risk again. I need to talk to her, I need to make her stay here, if she needs a break I will take her to Aspen or New York, just not a girls holiday, I know what a girls holiday entails and I will not let any other man touch Ana.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen:**

 **CPOV:**

It's been almost a week since I last saw Ana, I needed to get back to work which meant working all day and well into the night, it's never been a problem before, my job was always my number one priority but now that Ana is in my life, I'm finding it difficult to compromise. I won't even deny that I'm missing her, I'm missing her terribly. We've spoke everyday but it just wasn't the same, I needed to see her which is why I've flown down to Portland and now I am sat waiting for her to arrive in a nearby coffee shop from where she lives, she insisted I didn't need to pick her up, we would just meet each other here, she also told me she had a surprise for me but because she's almost twenty minutes late and it was beginning to rain quite hard, I was beginning to worry about her and if something had happened to her. Just as I am about to stand up and go in search for her myself she walks in, hair a little bit of a mess and slightly wet but she still looked beautiful to me. She looks around the coffee shop obviously looking for me, once she does spot me, her face splits into a grin as she starts walking towards me.

"I'm so sorry I'm late Christian, I had a few things to take care of first" she apologies to me, I'm just glad she got here in one piece.

"Is everything okay?" I ask her as we sit down.

"Yes, everything is great, I have some news" she says excitedly.

"Is this my surprise?" I ask intrigued.

"Well kind of…" she grins, I wait for her to continue.

"We've found a place to live in Seattle!" she says grinning at me, my face too splits into a grin. It's about time, I want her closer to me.

"That's great! Where? When?" I ask. When she told me her and Kate were looking for a place to live in Seattle, I immediately told her I would pay and find them an apartment so they could move quicker but Ana being Ana refused to take any money from me, in fact it ended up us both having another argument, I just couldn't stand Ana being so far away from me.

"We found it yesterday but I thought I'd wait to tell you today and surprise you" she smiles at me.

"Thank you Ana, I know we've had a disagreements about this, but I just want you safe and closer to me. I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you, you know that. So when are you moving?"

"I know Christian, moving to Seattle was our plan all along and I know you just wanted to help me and I appreciate it, I really do but I don't need your money, I just want you in my life…that's all"

"You have me Ana" if only she knew just how much she has me.

"I have more news…"

"Go on…"

"I have a job interview, well actually I have two" she says excitedly.

"Ana, congratulations! Are you going to tell me where?" I ask, she just shakes her head.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want you to use the power you have to get me a job, I want to do this on my own, please Christian?"

"I would never interfere when it comes to your career, not unless you ask me too" I tell her, even if it is a slight lie, I'll find out where she has job interviews and make sure they are safe places to work.

"So are you going to quit working in that nightclub?"

"No, I can't quit my job until I definitely know I have another one"

"Ana, you can't be serious? Once you move to Seattle, you can't keep driving back to Portland, it's not practical" _and it's definitely not safe._

"I have no choice Christian"

"Yes you do, you can take up my offer and come and work for me"

"No Christian I can't, I need to start my own career, and I need to build my life here"

"But travelling back to Portland is not practical Ana" I argue.

"I know, which is why I won't be, instead I'm getting transferred over, and I've already spoke to my boss, there's a couple of bars that want to meet me to discuss hours and pay etc…"

"Ana you shouldn't be working at all in that type of environment"

"It's only until I get a job in publishing…" she argues with me, we are always going to disagree on this.

"Ana…" I start.

"No Christian, please, this is my choice. I have to work, if I am not successful in these interviews then I will be out of a job, I can't let that happen. Please try and understand, I won't change my mind about this, you just have to trust me…"

"I trust you completely Ana, you know that"

"Good, now can we please change the subject, how's GEH?" she asks and just like that the subject is changed but certainly not forgotten, I won't let her continue working in bars without protection anymore and she argue with me about that all she wants it won't matter, my decision is final. We soon get talking about GEH, I tell her that I'll be heading to New York soon on a business trip hoping that she would ask to come with me because I know she has never been before. But no, her holiday to Barbados with Kate is very much going ahead much to my disapproval.

"Ana, I need to know you'll be okay in Barbados with Kate, anything could happen to you and the thought of it…I don't want Kate to leave you or wonder off without you when she meets some guy…"

"Christian, what happened with Kate and Elliot is just as much his fault as it is hers. They both made a mistake, Kate wants to be with him but if he's still going to get married next week then Kate doesn't want to be around for that and as I am her best friend, I am standing by her side...if she meets some guy then she meets some guy…"

"But what about you?"

"What do you mean?"

"If she meets some guy, where does that leave you? You'll be on your own…are you going to go off and meet someone?" Why am I asking her this? _Because you are jealous of every guy that talks or breathes the same air as her you just won't tell her that._

"Christian, I am not interested in meeting someone on holiday in Barbados, I'll be perfectly fine, me and Kate both need this, I'll only be gone a week and then I'll be back here to start my life in Seattle, I promise you, I won't do anything remotely stupid" _I don't believe her._

"How do you know? What if your drink is spiked again and I am not there this time? What if nobody is and…."

"You have to stop thinking about the what if's Christian, trust me please and know that I'll be okay, I'll call you every hour if that helps" she jokes but I don't find it funny at all.

"That's not funny Ana"

"Christian I am not trying to be funny, I'm trying to make you understand where I'm coming from…I promise you, I'll always keep in contact with you, I'll be careful, if I do drink, I won't leave it unattended, I'll never do that again and as for meeting someone, how could I?!"

"What do you mean?"

"It doesn't matter"

"No please Ana, tell me the truth…"

"No Christian I can't tell you"

"Yes you can, you can tell me anything"

"Not this I can't…"

"Why not?"

"Because it would ruin our friendship" _What does she mean by that?_

"Ana, I don't understand…" she cuts me off.

"Isn't it obvious to you, the real reason as to why I'm going on holiday, I need time to think…"

"Think about what?"

"You…ever since we met, I…Christian, I don't want to talk about this"

"Ana…"

"Christian please, I understand, I completely do…your my best friend, I can talk to you about anything, if something happens either good or bad you're the first person I think to tell, I haven't told Kate about my job interviews yet because I wanted you to be the first to know. You make me feel safe, I've been running my whole life, I've been on my own my whole life but now I'm not, thanks to you…I understand the life you live, I accept it because it's you, I'd do anything for you and you know that even though I know you'd never ask me because you would be trying to protect me. But the more time I spent with you, the more I realised it's not just friendship I want with you, for the first time in my life I want more but I know you don't, you've said yourself I am your only friend, I don't want to be, if I could do anything for you it would be to set you free, Elliot loves you Christian, you're his brother and his best friend and if you gave him a chance you'd realise that too. I'm not saying I don't want you in my life because I do, the reason I'm telling you this is because I do want you always in my life but I need to forget about whatever feelings I may have towards you…

"Ana I…why haven't you told me this before now?" I can't believe what I'm hearing, I badly want to tell her what I feel but I can't say it, I haven't even admitted anything fully to myself yet.

"Because I was hoping I'd go to Barbados, come back and I'll be fine and I would never have to tell you"

"And that's what you want?" _…please say no Ana!_ She sighs and takes a deep breath.

"Yes it is" she mumbles quietly.

"Ana"

"All I am asking for is some time away, let me think about this…you are my best friend and nothing is going to change that, I'll always be here"

"Then why does it now feel completely different? Like you are somehow telling me goodbye?"

"I'm not saying goodbye Christian, I'd never do that to you"

"I don't want you to go Ana, I don't want you be disappear for a week to then come back and want nothing to do with me, because that's what's going to happen isn't it?"

"No it's not Christian…"

"Ana, it will, you should have told me"

"And then what? We'd still be having this same conversation, I'm telling you how I feel but I know you just see me as your friend and I get that"

"I don't think you do Ana, you've got no idea just how much you mean to me. I can't lose you"

"And you won't, look I'm going to go, I didn't want us having this conversation Christian, you mean the world to me and nothing will change that. I think it's best if we both keep our distance, at least until I come back from Barbados and you come back from New York…" _Stop her Grey, before she walks out of your life for good!_

"Please don't do this Ana…" I beg her as she stands up, I get up too, and straight away she hugs me tightly.

"I'll be back before you know Christian, I promise" she whispers as she lets go of me and before I can even respond, she walks away from me, it's a good job there's a seat next to me because I practically collapse onto it. Now what do I do? I know I've lost her, I know she'll come back and yes we may be alright at first but then she'll eventually meet someone and I'll be pushed out of her life for good and once again I'll be on my own. She's so close into stealing the heart she breathed life into and now she's killed it again by walking away. All I can now feel is darkness, the light has gone, the happiness has gone, she's gone and I know I'll never have her back. My thoughts are interrupted by my phone buzzing in my pocket, a text message, from Ana:

 **I'm sorry for leaving you the way I did, I promised you long ago that I'd never leave you and I'll stick to that promise. Just give me some time, which is all I'm asking from you. You mean the absolute world to me Christian Grey, remember that. I'll see you soon. Ana x**

I know why she's sent me this, she's trying to reassure me but it's not working, if anything its making me feel worse, why do I feel like this? This girl has completely changed my life, changed it in ways she could never understand, I don't think I even understand. I need to figure out what I want, I need to give her the space she needs no matter how painful or impossible it will be. I'm still putting protection on her, I don't care what she says, I want to know she's safe at all times. I quickly text Taylor telling him to sort out security for Ana as quickly as possible, the sooner the better in my eyes. I don't know what to reply to Ana so I don't, I stand up from where I'm sitting and leave the coffee shop. Now she's left, I don't know what do with myself, I thought we would spend the weekend together but I obviously can't do that now so I have no choice but to head back to Seattle.

Flying always helps me clear my mind whether I'm in my faithful Charlie Tango or I'm gliding, I know Ana would love gliding, I plan on taking her one day if she'll let me, I shake my head at the thought. I slowly make my way back to my helicopter and once I climb aboard, I quickly do safety checks and depart, my heart staying behind in Portland with a beautiful girl who no longer wants to be in my life.

 **ANON POV:**

Who does he think he is? Talking to my girl, being so close to her? I've been following her ever since the day I met her, I have to make her mine, I just need to get her beloved Christian Grey out of the picture and that's exactly what I've done. I met Grey a long time ago, not that he remembers but I sure do, he ruined my life and I'm about to take his. I've been following Miss Steele so much without her realising and I know she was meeting him today and I know he was flying over in his helicopter and this gave me an opportunity I couldn't pass up, I watched him from a distance land his helicopter and I watched him leave to meet up with Anastasia with a smile on his face, that smile won't be on your face for much longer Grey! I quickly get to work with what I needed to do and before anyone notices. Once it's done, I head off to where Grey is meeting up with her and then watch as my plans unfold.


	17. Chapter 17

_**Authors Note: Enjoy!**_

 **Chapter Seventeen:**

Well that was the hardest thing I've probably ever had to do and I don't even understand why I did it all…I know I've hurt him, I could see it in his eyes, I wasn't planning on telling him how I felt, it just slipped out and I knew then that I would have to tell him the truth. I text him telling him all I want is some time and I'll be back soon but as I send it, it just doesn't feel right. _I'm such an idiot!_ He's the best thing to have ever happened in my fucked up life and I've just walked away from him even when I promised him I would never leave. My feelings for him grow stronger each time I see or just speak to him, I can't help it, he's the first man I've ever let myself have feelings for and pretty strong feelings at that. I know he's my best friend but I can't deny that I don't want more than that because I do, I just didn't give him a chance, I didn't even give him a chance to talk. I stop abruptly in the middle of the street causing someone to walk into me from behind, the middle aged man curses me from behind and walks past me. I need to go back and see him, I should not have walked off like that, knowing Christian as well as I do, he'll be beating himself up pretty bad right now, I quickly type out another text to him telling him I'm coming back, as I begin to run back to the coffee shop, I doubt he'll still be there but I can at least try and see. As I thought, he's gone. _Great!_ I dial is number and ring him, he doesn't answer, it goes straight to his voicemail, I don't leave him a message, I doubt he'll listen to it. I could just drive to Seattle, I start running again back towards my apartment, and I'll drive to Seattle. I'm soon on the road heading towards Seattle, I still keep ringing him, if he knew I was driving whilst using my phone he'd probably kill me but I don't care, I can't just leave for Barbados with this hanging over us.

My entire journey is consumed of thoughts of Christian, hours later and not soon enough, I can see the Seattle skyline in my vision, Christian still hasn't answered his phone, he should be at his penthouse by now, he flew to Portland, so I know he must be ignoring me. I continue on as I drive through the streets of Seattle and realise I haven't got a clue on where Escala is, I need to ask someone, I quickly pull over and find someone to ask, once I've got directions I hurry back to my car and continue driving towards Escala. Once I reach my destination, I quickly park up, I don't really care whose space I've parked in, I'll come and move my car later on I just need to see Christian, I reach the same elevator we used last week, thinking back, I can't believe that that was only a week ago. I press the button and wait anxiously as the elevator closes, once it does, I stand impatiently waiting chanting 'come on' in my head over and over again. Finally I arrive at his penthouse, he must know I'm coming otherwise I wouldn't have been allowed access up here.

I step out into the foyer of his penthouse and look around, I walk through hoping he would just appear, he doesn't, and it's very quiet. I don't really know where to look for him, he never gave me a tour of his home. I hear footsteps behind me and I turn around and see Taylor standing there.

"Is Christian here?" I ask him before he can speak.

"He's not with you?" he asks me.

"No, he was until around 1 o'clock, I thought he'd come back here" I don't say much else, Taylor doesn't need to know my issues. Taylor quickly pulls out his phone and dials a number, I assume Christian's, he can ignore me all he likes, he wouldn't ignore his head of security. I stand still and wait but nothing, nobody answers Taylor's call.

"He never answered me either Taylor" I tell him, he looks at me again uncertainly.

"When was the last time you spoke or saw him Ana?"

"The last time I saw him was about 1 o'clock, I text him twice after that, no later than twenty minutes after that but he didn't reply to them, I called him over a dozen times but he never answered, I just assumed he was ignoring me".

"He would never ignore your call Ana, let me try and find out if he went back to his helicopter or if he's still in Portland", I was now beginning to worry, and surely nothing would have happened to him. Taylor abruptly leaves in the middle of his penthouse and heads towards what I assume his office. I make my way towards his kitchen and find a woman standing there, I've never actually met her but I'm assuming its Gail, his housekeeper. She spots me and smiles warmly.

"You must be Ana, I've heard a lot about you" _Oh!_

"I'm guessing your Gail, Christian's housekeeper?" she nods.

"Yes, I'm here Monday until Friday, it's a pleasure to finally meet you"

"Thank you, and you…" I'm about to say more but Taylor walks back in with a grave look on his face and it's then I know something is wrong.

"What's wrong?"

"Mr. Grey did leave on his helicopter, it's just been confirmed…he departed at around 1:40pm, he should have been back by 3 o'clock, but he never arrived here, it's now almost 7pm and he hasn't been seen at all. I've rang his office at GEH and there's nobody there, did he say anything at all about where he might be going?" he asks me, I shake my head.

"No, he was supposed to be staying with me but there was a change of plan and I had to leave, I don't know anything else…he's missing?" I ask, dreading the answer.

"Not yet, he'll turn up" he says, trying to convince me but I think he's trying to convince himself.

"What if he doesn't Taylor?" he doesn't answer me as his phone begins to ring, he wonders off back to his office leaving me with Gail and my own thoughts.

"Would you like anything to drink Ana?" Gail interrupts my thoughts and I sit down on a bar stool. I just shake my head, I don't think I can talk. I pull out my phone and look at my screensaver, it's actually a picture of me and Christian, I forced him to have a picture with me and eventually he gave in to my persistent nagging and I got one. _Where the hell are you Christian?_ _When you do decide to show up, I'm going to kill you!_ I stand up and walk towards the glass windows and look out at the Seattle skyline, it's a beautiful view from up here, the best view actually but it doesn't really mean anything to me if the man that lives here is no longer with me, all I see is nothing.

I don't know how much time has passed but it's getting almost pitch black outside so I know it's getting later and later. Taylor has alerted the rest of security about Christian's disappearance and they are out there looking for him, he's also alerted his family not long ago and I know they are on their way here, I've only ever met his brother Elliot and briefly his Mom, I don't know how I feel about meeting the rest of them all so suddenly and in terrible circumstances too but there's nothing I can really do about it. I vaguely hear the elevator doors ping open, I don't even look to see who it is, I know it won't be Christian, I hear footsteps coming closer, I know it must be his family.

"Ana…" I recognise the voice of Kate pull me out of my thoughts, I completely forgot to tell her what was going on and now she's here, how did she know. I look up and she's standing in front of me with a sad expression her face, I don't say anything to her as she sits down next to me.

"Elliot called me to tell me what had happened, he came and picked me up…" I just nod once letting her know I heard her, I hear more footsteps coming towards me, and I have feeling its Elliot, I know I'm right when he starts speaking.

"He'll come back Ana, I know my brother, and he wouldn't just disappear like this without a reason…he wouldn't just leave you either…" his voice trails off at the last part. Right now, I don't care, I want him back.

"Ana?" a voice I don't recognise speaks my name, I look up and see a girl, I'm guessing my age looking back at me with a tear stained face, sparkling eyes, short brown hair.

"I'm Mia, Christian's sister, I've heard a lot about you from Elliot, I'm so happy to finally meet you" before I can even respond, she sits down next to me and hugs me tightly.

"Thanks…" I answer quietly, I only wish we were meeting under better circumstances, Christian adores his baby sister. I couldn't help but feel incredibly guilty, here I was with Christian's family and I am doing nothing but sit here and wallow in my own sadness about his disappearance, I'm not helping anybody by sitting here. As discretely as I can, I stand up and leave the seating area where Elliot, Kate and Mia are sat, past the kitchen where Christian's mom and I'm guessing his father are stood talking to Gail waiting for Taylor to come back with news and I wonder off down the hall until I reach his bedroom. I can feel eyes on me but I don't care, I don't know why I feel as though I should come in here, I've slept in here before but he was here too with me now it just feels cold and empty. I need to snap out of it, I'm already thinking he's not coming back.

I wonder around his room looking at nothing in particular until I eventually sit on the bed and then lay down and then curl up into a tight ball holding on to a pillow, I'm not crying, I don't think I can cry, I just stare at the wall thinking of nothing. If he does come back I'm going to give him hell for doing this, putting his family through this, I guess I don't feel like sitting out there because I'm not part of the family, neither is Kate but she's much more sociable than me and can make small talk and conversation with just about anyone, me on the other hand can't, I'll be asked about my life, about my past, where I grew up and I don't want to talk about that, the only person I would talk about that too is missing. I close my eyes trying to shut everything out and eventually I must fall asleep.

I wake up to something or someone stroking my cheek gently, at first I refuse to open my eyes but whatever it is feels familiar so I open my eyes and I'm met with those beautiful grey eyes staring back at me, automatically I start crying uncontrollably as a familiar safe pair of arms circle around me and hold me tightly.

"Christian…" I manage to choke out, he pulls me tighter.

"Shhhh, I'm here, I'm here…"

"I thought, I thought…" I can't seem to put a sentence together.

"I know but I'm here, I'm okay and I'm not going anywhere" and suddenly out of nowhere, I'm angry at him, I pull away from him and sit up so I can look at him.

"Where were you? Do you have any idea what you've just put your family through?" I shout at him.

"Ana…"

"Don't Ana me Christian, how could you? Why didn't you call them? Why didn't you at least call or text me…"

"Ana, enough! There's a very good explanation I can assure you but right now I just want to be with you, can we please not argue?"

"I want to know now…do your family know?"

"Yes as does the rest of the Seattle…" he pauses.

"What do you mean?" I demand as I take a good look at him properly, it's only then I realise that he looks exhausted and scruffy, his shoes are off and his shirt is torn to mention the cut on his forehead and the bandage on his arm.

"What happened to you Christian?" I ask, tears welling up in my eyes again.

"Charlie Tango…" he whispers quietly. _Oh no…_

"Are you okay? Are you hurt?

"I'm fine Ana, I promise" he says trying to reassure me, it doesn't work.

"This wouldn't have happened if I hadn't left you, I'm sorry Christian, I don't know what I was thinking, I thought I was doing the right thing and then I realised I wasn't and I ran back to the coffee shop but you'd left, you'd gone back to your helicopter and you crashed…Christian, this is all my fault, I'm so sorry, you could have died…" I burst into tears again.

"No, please don't cry Ana, I'm sorry, you have no idea how sorry I am that all this has happened…" he holds my face in both of his hands and wipes my tears away, he looks into my eyes like he's searching for something, and I think I know what because I want it too, I want to be with him, I want us to be together, I don't want him as just my best friend anymore. Before I can think about anything else or tell him how I feel, he kisses me.


	18. Chapter 18

_**Authors Note:**_

 _ **I hope you enjoy this chapter! I've recently changed my username, so I hope you don't get confused, it's still the same me writing this story**_ **.** _ **I've also realised I haven't said much about myself or said a proper hello. So Hi everyone! My name is Michelle, I'm 24 years old and I live in the UK, if you want to know more about me then please just ask, I don't mind or if you want to see more about me then you can follow my Instagram: MBATESONX. Also, I hope you've all been enjoying reading 'Grey', I know I have, I've finished it already, which is a good job really because the Fifty Shades DVD arrived on my doorstep this morning. Anyway, thank you once again for reading!**_

 **Chapter Eighteen:**

I wake up to a pair of strong arms wrapped around me tightly, I shift only slightly and see Christian fast asleep next to me, I shift slightly again to try and get up but Christian pulls me back to him and then sighs when he can feel me next to him. I reach up slightly and gently run my hand through his hair and he smiles in his sleep. I lay back down fully again and keep running my hand through his hair as I think back to everything that happened last night and smile at this beautiful man next to me:

" _No, please don't cry Ana, I'm sorry, you have no idea how sorry I am that all this has happened…" he holds my face in both of his hands and wipes my tears away, he looks into my eyes like he's searching for something, and I think I know what because I want it too, I want to be with him, I want us to be together, I don't want him as just my best friend anymore. Before I can think about anything else or tell him how I feel, he kisses me._

 _My thoughts are scattered as I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him towards me, I don't want to let him go, not now. I've hidden my feelings for him for far too long, if he walked away now telling me he still only wants to be friends then I don't think I could do it, I would have to walk away from him for good, I wouldn't come running back to him. Realising this is I pull away from him, we stare at each other for what feels like hours, neither of us saying or doing anything we are just looking at each other. I'm the first to break the silence, I know we need to talk._

" _Christian, why did you…what, I don't understand…" I can't seem to string a simple sentence together, I just want to be in his arms again._

" _Ana, I don't know what to say, I mean I know what I want to say but I'm afraid to say it…"_

" _Just tell me the truth Christian, I've known all along about I feel about you, I've just been hiding it or trying not to admit it to myself. But I can't anymore and I won't, for the first time in my life I've found somewhere where I want to be, where I want to stay, I've been avoiding every emotion within me since I was 13 years old but I can't do it anymore…" I pause and take a deep breath._

"… _I want to be with you Christian Grey, I want more, I want to be more than friends, and even though the thought of ruining our friendship terrifies me I'm willing to take the chance, I've said all I've wanted to say probably since the day I met you now it's down to you…" I stop talking and stare at him, waiting for some kind of response from him, after what probably only was a few seconds, he starts talking._

" _We are the same Ana in so many ways…I met you and you flipped my controlled, dull world upside down. Before you I was alone, you've said it yourself so many times about just how isolated I was from everyone, including my family. But then now, since meeting you, spending time with you, you've made me more of a man, I told you everything there is to know about my past, the lifestyle I used to live by and you stood by me even though you should have walked away from me. I didn't want to do anything that could possibly make you want to leave and walk away so I just convinced myself that we are friends, nothing more because that's what I thought you wanted. It drives me crazy when I see another man talking to you or just looking at you, or I hear Kate trying to set you up with someone, I can't stand it, I'm beyond jealous because I want to be that guy. When you told me how you really felt I was shocked, that's why I didn't say anything. I definitely don't want you to go to Barbados with Kate, the thought of it fills me with panic, panic that you might meet someone, someone who deserves you or something happens to you, I want you to be safe at all times and I want to be the one that makes you feel that way…"_

" _You do make me feel that way Christian, I feel safe, and the safest I have ever been in my life…" I whisper to him as he reaches for my hands and then kisses each one of my knuckles in turn._

"… _I want to be with you Ana and I want you to be with me. I don't ever want to think about my life without you in it, I can't do it. We will probably have to guide each other because I have no clue on how to be in a relationship, I don't even know where to start…"_

" _We'll start together and learn together…"_

" _When I crashed, all I could think about was you, they say your life flashes before your eyes in situations like that and it did, every thought, and every memory was of you, I thought of nothing else. That why I knew I had to come back and tell you how I felt. I don't know how I did it but I managed to land, I was flying too low realistically. For a few seconds I thought I'd never see your face again or looking into those eyes that have captivated me since the day we met. When I eventually made it home, I wanted you here, I wanted to hold you in my arms and then never let you go ever again. My Mom told me you was in my apartment, somehow she could see all I wanted in that moment was you, I said I would explain everything that had happened when we were all together so I only had to do it once, my Mom told me how you were when you all thought I was dead, I wouldn't dare leave you like that Ana…"_

" _They must be think I'm a terrible person, I didn't even try and make conversation with anyone, I just sat there staring into space, into my own little world thinking of you, if you was hurt, if you needed me…your sister Mia, I can see why you adore her Christian, I didn't even meet your father, I just came in here and curled up into a ball hoping it was all a dream…"_

" _My family understood completely, my Mom especially, she adores you Ana…I told them I just wanted to sleep and then all meet tomorrow, that includes you. We can do proper introductions tomorrow, I promise you, and they don't think you are a terrible person, quite the opposite actually…" he pulls me back over to him and I snuggle back into his arms, where I know I belong, he tilts my chin up so I can look at him in the eyes._

" _You have my heart Anastasia Steele, a heart that I didn't know existed until you stumbled into my life…" he whispers softly before leaning down and brushing his lips against my own softly._

"Ana?" I'd been so busy thinking about last night that I hadn't even noticed Christian waking up and was now watching me. I look at him and smile, he grins back.

"How are you feeling?" I ask him, he was exhausted before we curled up together and eventually fell asleep.

"I couldn't be happier…" I roll my eyes at him, again he glares at for me doing so.

"Ok, take me out of the equation for a second, how are you actually feeling?" he sighs.

"I ache a little and I'm still a little tired but I don't care…"

"Well I do, you stay here and I am going to get us some breakfast…"

"Ana, Gail can do that, it's what she's here for…"

"That maybe the case but you are still staying here, I will bring you something…"

"Ana" he groans at me.

"No arguments Christian, please for me stay here" this time, it's him that rolls his eyes at me.

"Fine, I'll stay here but hurry back"

"You won't even get the chance to miss me…" I joke with him, as I stand up he reaches for me and pulls me back down and then rolls us over so he's half on top of me.

"I always miss you Miss Steele" I laugh and wrap my arms around his neck, my hands getting lost in his hair and pull him towards me, his lips seeking out mine. This kiss feels different from last night, last night I think we were both still a little uncertain about what we were to each other but now I know we are both feeling the same. Eventually though, Christian pulls away from me but keeps on smirking at me.

"You better go and get us breakfast before I decide on keeping you here..." he says before rolling off me and letting me get up. I lean over and give him one more kiss before heading out to find us some breakfast. Gail was already in the kitchen when I got there, she spots me walking towards her and smiles.

"Good morning Ana, how are you this morning?"

"I'm good thank you Gail, I'm better than good actually, I was about to make Christian some breakfast…"

"How is Mr. Grey this morning? Don't worry about breakfast, I'll make it for you both, what would you like?"

"Omelettes please Gail if that's okay?"

"Of course it is, you sit down and I'll make breakfast for you both. Would you like a cup of tea?"

"Please Gail, thank you" I say, she smiles and then smiles at something behind her and I know exactly what that something is when he wraps his arms around me.

"I missed you…" he whispers in my ear out of earshot of Gail, I place my hands over his.

"I knew you wouldn't be able to stay in bed" I say quietly.

"I couldn't..."

"You didn't even try Christian…"

"I did, I think I waited an entire five minutes before getting up actually Miss Steele, anyway I have an important question to ask you? He says as he moves from behind me and sits next to me.

"And what is that question Mr. Grey?" I ask, before he answers Gail comes over and sets tea and coffee down in front us aswell as setting our plates, we both say thank you to her and I turn my attention back to Christian who's already looking right at me.

"As you was saying Mr. Grey?" I smile at him.

"For once I am going to get this right…so Miss Steele, I'd like to take you out to dinner…" my smile gets better.

"Are you asking me out on a date?"

"I am, our first official date. I want to do this right, I want to impress you, I want to pick you up at your apartment, I want to do it all, so what do you say Miss Steele?" I stand and he moves so I can stand in between his legs, I weave my hands through his hair and smile.

"It's a date Christian, I'd love to go on a date with you, our first official date" I grin at him. He wraps his arms around me tightly, we are only interrupted by Gail who's finished making our breakfast. I move out of his arms reluctantly and sit back down beside him.

"Tonight, I want to take you out tonight…" Christian begins.

"Christian, if you want to do this right then we are going to do this right and not jump in straight away…first we are going to go over to your parents so we can go through everything that happened yesterday…"

"Ana…"

"You promised your family Christian, and I'd like to know too. After that, I am going to go home…"

"No, please stay here with me"

"Christian, a date is exactly that, a date, we don't stay, come and go from the same apartment, you said you wanted to impress me well I'm giving you a chance to impress me Mr. Grey…"

"And…what's wrong with tonight?"

"Because I want to impress you too, so I'd like more time…"

"Ana, you don't need to impress me"

"Yes I do and I want too, so pick another night?"

"Ana, you seriously don't. I'm leaving for New York on Tuesday until Friday morning…" _Oh…_

"So Friday night it is"

"Ana, that's too far away…"

"No it's not, I'll be with you all day today before heading home, I'll come and see you before you leave for New York and Friday night will be here before you know it".

"It's impossible to argue with you"

"We aren't arguing, we are negotiating" I grin at him before standing up again and heading back towards his bedroom to get ready.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen:**

Tuesday soon arrived and I was on my way to visit Christian before he headed for New York later on this afternoon, I won't lie, I'm going to miss him terribly, now that we've both admitted how we really feel about one another, it's going to much more difficult to be apart, that became apparent when we were at Christian's parents' house and he all but begged for me to join him New York, obviously I told him I couldn't, I had a job, I'd already be taking time off to go to Barbados with Kate, and plus I had to pack, I was moving to Seattle in a couple of days and I could not wait to start my new life.

For now though I was standing in the elevator on my way up to Christian's penthouse, we'd spend most of the day together before he'd have to leave and I would head back home again. As I walked out into the foyer Christian was standing there waiting for me. I hadn't seen him since Sunday, after we had visited his parents to discuss what had happened to his helicopter. It was a gruelling conversation, I sat by Christian's side the whole time he told us what had happened, his team were looking into the crash, there was every reason to believe Charlie Tango had been tampered with and that terrified me down to my very core, I haven't told Christian just how scared I am about this but I feel someone is obviously after him and wants him out of the picture, whatever picture that maybe. But now, seeing his face and his smile I push all of those thoughts aside as I run the last few steps to reach him and fall into his open arms, he laughs and picks me and spins me around in the middle of his foyer, I laugh along with him, it seems as though he missed me just as much as I missed him.

"Hi baby" he whispers in my ear, I can feel myself blush almost instantly, Christian has started to call me 'baby' which to me was unlike him and so like him at the same time. Every time he did I found myself wanting to kiss him all over his face which I often did, today was no exception, it's like he now expects it to happen and doesn't let me go until I do. I kiss every inch of his face I can reach but I reach his lips last. As soon as I do, he puts my down on my feet again but keeps me in his arms, I hear a small moan escape from the back of Christian's throat, in this moment I don't know how I am going to cope with him being all the way in New York, I know I'm going to miss him far too much. Eventually and reluctantly I pull away from him so I can look at him, he's smiling at me.

"Hi yourself, I missed you" I say whilst running my hands through his hair.

"I missed you too!" and he kisses me again, just once before taking my hand and leading us through his home until we reach his kitchen where Gail is already preparing our lunch for us. We both sit down and just continue to look at each other and smiling like fools, he's the first to break the silence.

"I have news, big news actually…" I don't reply, I just wait for him to continue.

"Elliot has called off the wedding…something about falling for another women, I can't think who that is…" he says the last part sarcastically, I tap him on his arm.

"Christian, I know you don't like Kate that much but all you need to do is get to know her and then you'll realise she's not all that bad"

"Ana please…"

"And besides, how do you know this?

"He stayed here last night, he just left before you arrived, he confessed everything to Megan..."

"Megan?"

"His fiancée or ex fiancée now, I realise you never met her and I'm glad you didn't, after he did, she kicked him out and he ended up here blind drunk I might add"

"I'm guessing Kate doesn't know?" I'm only guessing this because she hasn't mentioned any of this to me.

"I've no idea, she won't speak to him, apparently they had a blazing argument after they left here the other night after I got back and they haven't spoken since, she won't answer his calls. I don't think he's given up, in fact I think he's on his way to your apartment right now…"

"She'll give in to him, she always does when it comes to your brother, she may argue with him but that's just because she's trying to hide her true feelings, the whole reason of Barbados anyway was for her to get over him and for me to…"

"Get over me?" he finishes my sentence for me.

"It's not going to happen Christian Grey, just so you know, you've got me"

"I'm glad to hear that…" I lean over and kiss his cheek. "Well maybe you won't be going to Barbados next week after all" he continues.

"Christian, our flights are booked, we can't cancel now. I know you don't want me going but I'm going to support my friend, that's all, you just have to trust me"

"Ana, I trust you more than anyone, I trust you with my life I just don't like the idea, we've finally just got together, we haven't even been on our first date yet and already I'm leaving for New York for the rest of the week and then you leave for Barbados on Sunday for a week…"

"Is that what you are worried about? That because we haven't properly been together that long, you are already worried that we are spending too much time apart?"

"Yes, I don't want us to fail Ana"

"We won't, there's no way I would give you up and there's no way I'd leave you, so you are stuck with me I'm afraid", he doesn't reply, he just pulls me into his arms and holds me against him tightly.

"So, what do you have planned for us on Friday?" I ask him changing the subject.

"Now that would be telling Miss Steele, it's a surprise"

"You know I hate surprises Christian…" I whine like a child and he just laughs at me.

"I know, all the more reason to do it"

"Christian…please just give me a little clue?"

"No, you'll just have to wait and see, I promise you will love it" I decide to drop it, I know he's not going to tell me.

"So, what time do you have to leave?" I ask him.

"In about three hours, you've got me until then…" _I won't admit it but I feel like the luckiest girl in the world…_

Just over three hours later and I've just said goodbye to Christian and I won't see him now until Friday, our goodbye was full of kisses, and promises to speak every day without fail, no matter the time difference. I won't lie, I'm going to miss him terribly, a part of me doesn't think I'll be able to cope without seeing him but I have too, I have no choice in the matter. I'm hoping the next few days will fly, I've got a lot to get done, I've got to pack for the move to Seattle, pack for Barbados, I have a couple of shifts at the club lined up, I'm hoping all that will take my mind off the fact that my heart may have just gone to New York with Christian.

I arrive back at the apartment and find Kate sat in the kitchen looking like she's lost in her own thoughts, I wonder for a second if Elliot is here too. Eventually she looks up at me, I can tell she's been crying.

"Kate?"

"Ana, I officially hate men, actually I officially hate Elliot Grey! He comes by, banging on the door yelling at me to let him in, and then he tells me he's not getting married and it's all my fault, she kicked him out and he's blaming me for everything! I'm glad we are going on holiday so we can both forget about those Grey brothers…" _Shit!_ I suppose it isn't the best time to bring up me and Christian.

"Kate, I honestly don't think he does mean it…"

"Of course he does Ana, I broke up his engagement…"

"No, you are both at fault here, not just you…"

"Well thanks for being on my side Ana!" she snaps at me, I roll my eyes at her.

"You can't say you are not part to blame for this situation Kate, you slept together, you knew he was getting married and you still went ahead and slept with him. He's to blame aswell because if he was truly happy he would not have cheated, he would have stayed away from you and I think the fact that he came round here pretty much sums it up, he doesn't want to stay away from you, he's just angry, probably angry at himself and he wanted to take it out on someone and that someone was you…"

"Well he can stay angry at me all he wants, I don't want anything to do with him"

"The fact that you've said that tells me you are lying to yourself Kate…"

"Whatever…I'm moving on!" she says and walks off into her bedroom.

"Keep telling yourself that Kate!" I shout after her just as she slams her bedroom door.

She doesn't come out for the rest of the afternoon, she knows I'm right and the sooner she admits it to herself the better, I'd like to be able to enjoy my holiday to Barbados. Whilst she's sulking I decide to clean up the apartment, I've heard nothing from Christian, I'm just assuming he's in the air and obviously can't communicate with anyone. It's whilst I'm cleaning up the kitchen I notice our mail, I rummage through it finding nothing but bills or just junk mail until I reach the last one in the pile and freeze completely. Kate obviously hadn't looked through the mail otherwise she would have noticed this. It's a letter, addressed to me but to my old name, my name before I became Anastasia Steele, it has no stamps on it which means it must have been hand delivered, my hands start to skate and I automatically run and lock the door quickly, I feel like I can't breathe, why does this have to happen to me now? I've only just started to move on with my life and enjoy it and now this happens, I run to my bathroom and throw up the contents of my stomach…I'm glad Kate's sulking and not seeing this right now. I know I have to open this letter but I can't do it, I'm not brave enough or strong enough to face it alone. I need Christian with me, he'd know what to do but he's not, he's all the way in New York and won't be back until Friday. I look at the envelope that is still screwed up in my hands and make my way over to my bed and sit down, taking it a deep breath to try and calm myself down even though it doesn't really work and I then open it and begin to read.

 _Dear Sophie,_

 _You probably don't remember me, you haven't seen me since you was sixteen, I've worked in the police force for many years and in all those years I have never worked on a case like yours before. The last time I saw you, you told me you were planning on changing your name and in this case I do hope you have gone through with that plan but I only know you as Sophie so I apologise if you no longer go by this name. I don't want you to panic as to how I found you, I've recently moved to Portland, I only saw you from a distance but I knew it was that same sixteen year old girl straight away but she had grown up into the young woman you are today. What I am about to explain to you will come as a bit of a shock but I feel as though you have the right to know. When you walked into my police station all those years ago and told me everything that had happened to you, I felt the need to protect you straight away but as you refused to go into witness protection I couldn't do much, the only thing I could do was to make a promise to you that I would catch your step-father, your mother and everyone else involved, that was achieved, you didn't stay in Detroit long enough to know that I kept your promise Sophie, they were caught and without trail your step-father and mother went straight to prison. However, what you have to understand is that Detroit is very corrupt and your step-father was a lot more powerful than any of us realised. He's out Sophie, he's out of prison, I don't know where he is as I no longer work or live in Detroit but I still have a couple of loyal friends in the force there and they told me, I'm telling you this because you of all people have the right to know. The last thing I want you to do is panic and run, I only saw you for about a minute but I could see how happy you were, I'd hate for that to change. All I ask for is that you watch yourself and keep the people you love close, the young gentleman you was with when I saw you I believe is to be the Christian Grey, if you haven't already, tell him Sophie, tell him everything, a man as powerful as that will be able to keep you safe, just don't run. If you ever want to see me, I'm leaving you my private number for you to call. Please Sophie, do not run._

 _Best, Ray._

I sit and stare at the letter and read it through several times, there's only seven words throughout this whole letter that stick out to me; _'He's out Sophie, he's out of prison'_...If he's out, I know he will find me, it will only be a matter of time. I need to see Ray, he saved me all those years ago, I need to know more. I pick up my phone and notice I have three missed calls from Christian and two text messages from him:

 **I've arrived in New York safely, I miss you already. C x**

And then another one not long after…

 **I've tried calling you several times but there's no answer, are you okay? Please don't make me worry about you baby, call me back as soon as you can. I'm counting down the hours until Friday. C x**

 _Oh Christian…_ I miss you too and I want you back here, you'll stop me from running I know you will but you're not, you're in New York, I don't want him to worry about me so I quickly text him back.

 **I'm fine Christian, I'm sorry I missed your calls. I miss you too, more than you know at this precise moment. Don't worry about me, go and kick some ass for me! A xox**

I press send and then dial the number Ray has left me, I quickly dial it and wait for him to pick up. It rings three times before he answers.

" _Hello…"_

" _Ray it's An…I mean Sophie, I got your letter…" I don't even recognise my own voice, it's making me feel sick by saying Sophie out loud._

" _Sophie? I'm so glad you called me and you read my letter…I didn't think you would"_

" _Can we meet up, I need to know more, and I need to know everything?"_

" _Of course Sophie, are you free tomorrow at say 1 o'clock?"_

" _Yes I am, thank you Ray, for telling me…for warning me"_

" _No problem, I will see you tomorrow…"_

" _Thank you…"_ and we both hang up just as Kate comes bursting through my door, I quickly hide the letter under my duvet before she notices it.

"Ana, you are right, I don't want to move on, I'm heading out to see Elliot, are you going to be alright by yourself, I probably won't be back tonight?" I want to say no, but that would mean me explaining why she can't leave me here alone so instead I just nod.

"Great, also I don't know if you've already noticed but I got our mail, nothing but bills and junk I think…oh there was a letter for someone called Sophie Roberts but I assume that's for next door or something but I haven't managed to get round to posting it…" _Shit, she has seen it!_

"It's okay, I'll sort it" I say quietly, I don't know what else to say, I'm now lying to my best friend.

"Great! Wish me luck, I think I'll need it!"

"You won't Kate!"

"Hey, are you sure you're okay?" _No, I'm not okay!_

"Yes, I'm fine Kate now go and talk to Elliot"

"Cool, I'll see you tomorrow!" and with that she's gone and I'm now alone in our apartment. Minutes later, my phone comes to life, its Christian calling me.

"Hey…" I whisper quietly.

"Hey baby, you okay?"

"Yes of course, why?" I lie, I hate lying to him but I cannot tell him this over the phone.

"You sound very quiet and off, like your mind is elsewhere…"

"Sorry, I'm fine Christian, I've just got a bit of a headache" at least that part is true, my head is throbbing.

"Please take something baby and get an early night…" tears well up in my eyes and at least one fear falls down my cheek, I just want to scream at him telling him to come home but I can't. I manage to pull myself together before answering.

"I will do I promise, I'll call you tomorrow so we can talk proper then I promise…"

"Ok baby, get some sleep, I'll speak to you tomorrow"

"I miss you" I whisper to him, that I know is definitely true.

"I miss you too beautiful, so much…get some sleep and you'll feel better tomorrow"

"I will do, bye"

"Bye baby!" and with that he hangs up as I burst into tears.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty:**

Friday soon arrived and Christian was coming home today, I'd been distant with him all week, I just couldn't bring myself to have a normal conversation when my mind was completely elsewhere, he knows something is up too, he keeps asking me if I'm alright and no matter how many times I say I'm fine I know he doesn't believe me, after all he does know me better than anyone. Tonight we are supposed to be going out on our first official date but I just can't face it, I'm trying to think of excuses of why I need to cancel it, I know by telling him the truth would definitely do the trick but I just can't bring myself to say it all out loud. Furthermore, he's so excited and I know I should be, I was until I received that letter and my past decided to show it's ugly face. Detroit holds many demons for the both of us and I know me telling him will only upset him or make him angry, most likely both.

Me and Kate have officially moved to Seattle, it took us a couple of days to finally get everything unpacked and sorted, Elliot came over and helped us, Kate told me they are both trying to work things out slowly, he's just got out of a serious relationship, he was about to be married to another woman. All week she's had a permanent smile on her face unlike me, I've been quiet and distant with her too but she just thinks it's because I miss Christian which is true, I do miss him.

I met up with Ray to talk about what he told me in the letter, everything was true, I tried to keep calm and hold myself together but the once scared sixteen year old girl came through to the surface and I just cried, I just broke down and cried in the middle of crowded café in front of a man who I've only met once in my life. I told him about my life here, he asked me a little about Christian, I didn't say much about him, my relationship with Christian was private, if the public got wind of the fact that I am Christian's Grey girlfriend it would surely end bad for me, I needed to keep a low profile and going on a date with a famous billionaire wasn't going to do it, that's why I need to cancel it but I just can't think of a reason why, I could suggest us both staying in and I'll cook but I know he wants to go out for dinner, he's told me he has a surprise for me but he just won't tell me what that surprise is. I haven't heard from him all day, he's not messaged me at all to tell me when he's home, I've text him twice but I've had no reply, I'm hoping he's just in the air which is why he's not replying. I'm sat in my apartment trying to think of something to do to occupy my mind, I've already been for a run and that didn't help at all. My thoughts are interrupted by a knock on the front door, I slowly and unenthusiastically make my way over to the door and open it to find Christian standing there, he's home but he looks mad, in fact he looks furious, before I even say anything he walks straight in and past me, I follow him through the apartment and into the living room where he eventually starts talking.

"Who's this?!" he demands throwing a brown envelope which he's been carrying onto the table towards me. I pick it up and open up the envelope to find picture after picture of me and Ray, Ray holding me in his arms whilst I cried, him kissing my cheek when we met up and again when I left, me actually smiling…everything here in picture. I know it's been several minutes and I still haven't answered him.

"Christian I…I can explain this"

"You can, good, explain it to me then because I can't figure it out. I came home late last night from New York to surprise you, when I got to Escala to get changed to then come over here I find this in my office."

"Christian please just calm down and listen to me, there is an explanation for this and whatever it is you're thinking, you better stop thinking it right now…"

"Ana, how do you expect me to react? Here you are with another man, in another man's arms to be exact and you're crying, you've been distant with me ever since I left, you can keep telling me you're fine but I know different. Is this man the reason?"

"Yes and no, I haven't cheated on you if that's what you're thinking which I know it is because I know you, this man is a lot older than me Christian and besides that I wouldn't do that to you"

"Who is he Ana?"

"I'll tell you Christian, I'll tell you everything but please try and stay calm…" I turn around and head for my bedroom to retrieve my letter from Ray, I just know he's not going to take this well. Once I get it from my bedside draw I head back towards Christian who's pacing around in my living room, he stops when he sees me, I don't say anything I just pass the letter to him and step back. He looks at me for a brief moment before reading the letter, his face pales instantly as he's reading. Even after he's finished he still doesn't say anything, he doesn't even look up.

"Christian, please say something…" I say quietly. Before I can even react I'm being pulled into his arms, his arms circle around me so tightly that I can't even move.

"I'm sorry Ana, I'm sorry I overreacted I just don't like another man touching you, I didn't know who he has was and I panicked…" his words come out in a rush, I peek a look at him, he looks troubled, tired and worried, worried about me no doubt.

"Christian…"

"I would have come home if you'd have told me Ana, I would have got on my plane instantly so you didn't have to do this alone…"

"I know you would have but I just couldn't bring myself to tell you over the phone, all morning I've been trying to think of how to tell you, whatever I said I knew wouldn't sound right…" I pause for a second and then realise something.

"Who sent you these pictures?" I ask.

"I don't know, they were on my desk in my office amongst all my other mail…I asked Gail because she's the one who puts all mail in my office but she doesn't know, she thought it was odd but she just assumed I would know what it is"

"But Christian…"

"Don't Ana, I'll find out, right now I'm more concerned about you, tell me everything…" and so I did, I pulled him over to the couch, sat him down and told him everything that was said between me and Ray. By the end of the conversation Christian was on his feet, on his phone pacing up and down the room. I head for the kitchen leaving him alone, it doesn't take long for him to come and find me.

"I'm putting security on you…" he begins but I cut him off.

"You will do no such thing Christian, I don't want it…this letter changes nothing, I'm not having security on me, nothing has happened Christian…"

"I don't give a fuck Ana, I will not let anything happen to you, you need protecting when I am not around, these pictures obviously got into my home for a reason...someone is following you"

"Christian you don't know that…"

"ANA! Are you that naïve? These pictures say it all, someone is following you, Ana for fucks sake, I'm not having this discussion, you need protection!" I begin to argue back but I hear the door and I also hear voices, one being Kate the other Elliot's, they both appear a few seconds later.

"I thought I heard you shouting bro! Nothing new then?"

"Not now Elliot" Christian snaps.

"I take that as a yes…hey Ana!" I force a smile and turn away from his idiotic brother.

"Hi Elliot, how are you?"

"I'm good little lady…" he grins at me, Kate then interrupts us.

"Guess what Ana? Elliot thinks him and Christian should come to Barbados with us next week! How great is that?"

"Ana's not going Kate" Christian says sharply at Kate.

"What?" she turns to look at me, I just glare at Christian.

"Christian, yes I am going…and I think that's a great idea Elliot"

"I thought so too, what do you say little bro?"

"I can't, I have too many responsibilities and too much work to do"

"Bro, come on, relax a little, you've been gone all week, you always work, that's all you do…take some time out with Ana!"

"I said no Elliot!" Christian shouts, I know his behaviour has everything to do with me.

"Christian…" I begin but he cuts me off as he starts to leave the room.

"I have work to do, I'll call you later Ana" and before any of us can say anything, he's gone and slamming the door on his way out.

"Is everything okay between you two?" Kate asks.

"Yes Kate, everything is fine, I'll leave you both to it, I'm going to go lay down for a while" I walk out and towards my bedroom, I shut the door behind me and lock it. I'm angry, angry with myself, angry with Christian and his rude behaviour just then, I know it has everything to do with me, personally I think it would be great if him and Elliot came to Barbados with us, it would give me and Christian some time alone together after all I don't think we are going on our first date anymore.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-One:**

Christian didn't call me last night, I laid awake for hours waiting for him to call but he never did. I just wish he would talk to me and tell me what it is he's feeling. I know exactly what it is that I'm feeling, I thought about it over and over last night whilst in bed. He may seriously piss me off with his attitude and his need for control sometimes but I don't think I would have it any other way, I know I need him, I need him more than anyone else in my life, its cliché to say but I would be lost without him in my life. In the end, my mind got it down to one word… _Love._ I love him, I'm in love with him, once I realised that everything just clicked together and I managed to fall asleep for a few hours.

I woke up soon after and set myself down in front of the TV, I know I should go and see Christian myself and sort all of this out, I don't want to leave for Barbados with him mad at me, that's the last thing I want, especially now I've admitted to myself that I love him. But again, this is one thing he is going to have to understand, I am going on holiday with my best friend, now more than ever I need time away, to clear my head. My thoughts are interrupted as Kate and Elliot come stumbling into the room.

"Morning!" they both say to me, I can't help but smile at them, especially Kate, she looks happy. Why can't I have that? I should be waking up like that with Christian.

"Go and see him Ana!" I turn to look at Elliot.

"He hasn't called"

"And he probably won't, look I know my brother, he's as stubborn as they get, especially when it comes to you. I have never seen him like this, I'm not sticking up for the way he acted, he acted like a prick to you but them man is head over heels for you, that I can see…so please go and do me a favour and go and see him"

"I…but what if he doesn't want to see me?"

"Are you stupid, of course he does, I told you, he's stubborn and from what Kate tells me, so are you! You belong together, trust me" I look at Kate and she nods her head at me.

"He may be an arrogant arse at times but he makes you happy, I can see that, it radiates off of you in waves when he's around. Just go and see him and then come back so we can start packing" I nod at her as I stand up, they are both right, I just need to go and talk it out with him.

Now though as I drive towards Christian's penthouse, I need to think about what it is that I am going to say to him. I can't just tell him I love him, it would probably freak him out in fact I know it will so for now I will keep that thought to myself.

Once I arrive at Escala, I'm let up straight away, as I stand in the elevator as it rises I take a few deep breaths, I have to let him explain yesterday and not interrupt him. Once the elevator reaches his penthouse I step out and to my surprise he's standing there waiting for me. Without a word he pulls me to him and his lips seeking out mine. Something is different about this kiss, it's urgent, it's powerful. I soon give into it though and I wrap my arms around his neck and run my hands through his hair. His tongue gently strokes my bottle lip seeking access, I automatically let him, straight away our tongues battle it out against each other, without warning he lifts me up and I wrap my legs around his waist as he walks us through his penthouse and into his kitchen. He sits me down and pulls himself away from me.

"Hi" I manage to say whilst trying to catch my breath.

"Hi" he says back to me, we continue to stare at each other without saying a word. He has to be the one to start talking, eventually he does;

"We need to talk about yesterday, I apologise for not calling you after I said I would, I just needed some time to cool off, I thought that if I rang you, I would say something I would regret. I did nothing but think about us last night" he pauses.

"Did you reach any conclusions?" I ask quietly, I doubt he reached the same conclusions as I did.

"Yes, two, the first being you are the most stubborn and infuriating woman I have ever met in my life" I can't argue with that.

"And…the second?" he smiles and walks over to me and grasps my face between both of his hands and kisses me softly.

"I'm in love with you" he whispers in my ear and I think my heart just stopped. _What?_ I pull away from so I can properly see his face.

"What?"

"It's the only logical explanation I have for the way I am feeling, I thought about it non-stop last night and it just made sense, I love you Anastasia Steele, you beautiful, stubborn, infurati…" I don't let him finish his sentence, I just launch myself at him instead and I almost send us flying, luckily he's strong enough to hold us both up on our feet, tears begin to spill over my eyes as my lips seek out his desperately.

"I love you too" I say holding him tightly against me. He pulls away and stares at me wide eyed.

"You do?" he asks.

"Of course I do, I couldn't sleep last night either and I pretty much reached the same conclusion as you, I don't want to end up losing you just because I'm being a pain in the ass which I know I am. I'm sorry for that, I understand now your need to protect me, I have to face up to the fact that he's out there somewhere, I don't want anything to happen to you, I couldn't bare it but I know that it goes both ways, I assume anyway I'm still getting security but I just ask one thing…you have security too, I know you have Taylor but I want you safe, you are known all across the US, and if I'm seen with you and he sees, you'll become a target and…"

"Ana stop, for now let's forget all about that and instead think about us, and we might want to start packing…" he says as he wonders off out of his kitchen, straight away I'm following him.

"What do you mean?"

"Well after yesterday, I felt terrible, we didn't even go on our first date so I called Elliot and we are coming with you and Kate to Barbados, I've made all the arrangements and we are leaving on my private jet, tonight actually…"

"TONIGHT?!" I shout at him and he just laughs at me.

"Yes baby, so…"

"You could have told me Grey, I have to go and pack!"

"Baby, calm down, I have it all taken care off"

"You are unbelievable, do you know that?"

"I take it that's a good thing?"

"Yes, yes, yes!" and once I again I launch myself at him.


	22. Chapter 22

_Authors Note:_

 _I apologise for long delay in this story, I won't lie, I got caught up in the other story I am writing. Anyway, thank you for all your patience and here it is. It's not much, it's more of a filler chapter than anything, the next chapters will be them in Barbados but this had to be put in first. Thanks again for reading and until next time enjoy!_

 **Chapter Twenty-Two:**

I don't think I have ever been this excited before, here I was about to go on holiday with Kate and now Christian and Elliot have decided to join us too, true to his word Christian had organised everything, how he had done it in such a short space of time I don't really know but he has and now we are on our way to the airport to get on-board Christian's private jet. It's just me and him in the back of the SUV whilst Taylor drives us, Kate and Elliot are meeting us on the tar-mac.

Now that we've admitted how we really feel about each other, I feel weight has been lifted off my shoulders and to be honest I didn't even know it was there until I told him I loved him and then everything just started to make perfect sense. I loved him, I was completely in love with him, I wanted to scream it out at the top of my lungs so that everyone knew that this beautiful man who had become my best friend in a matter of months was now essentially the love of my life, I can't imagine myself not being with him ever. I look over at him to find he's already looking at me, he grins at me and I can't help but grin back, this man has told me he loves me despite all the shit I am bringing into his life.

"Are you happy?" he asks, is he kidding me?

"Christian, I have never been happier, I don't care that we haven't known each other that long, I don't care if all this seems too quick to everyone else, it's you and me and that is all I care about"

"Me and you baby"

"When was the last time you took some time off? Or even go on holiday?"

"I don't think I ever have so this is going to be a challenge for me, all I want is to see you happy, if you are happy then I am happy, it's that simple"

"I am so happy, so so so happy Mr. Grey"

"Me too baby, I'm hoping we can have some time to ourselves whilst we are away"

"I'm sure we will be able to manage that Christian"

"We still have our first date"

"Christian, I think we can skip that, we are about to go on holiday together"

"Not a chance, we are having our first date" I can't help but laugh.

"I have a feeling you have something planned?"

"That I do Miss Steele, that I do but you will just have to wait and see"

"You don't fight fair Mr. Grey"

"I know baby, I never have" and just as I am about to reply, I realise we are at the airport.

"Are you ready baby?"

"More than ever, lead the way Grey!" he gets out the car first and then holds out his hand for mine, I gladly give it to him and get out the car. I see another car nearby, I see the doors opening and Kate and Elliot step out. We leave Taylor to handle our suitcases and together we walk to them.

"How cool is this Steele?" Kate practically throws herself at me.

"Are we ready to go?" Christian then asks after he speaks to his brother for a few minutes.

"Yes" Kate and I say at the same time and then we follow Christian across the tarmac towards a jet, my jaw dropped open when I saw it, it's so impressive. The words 'Grey Enterprise Holdings' are painted on one side of the jet, Christian wraps an arm around my waist and I lean against him as we walk.

"Impressive Grey, very impressive"

"Do you like it?" he asks me.

"I more than like it, I often forget just how rich you are" he kisses the top of my head as I wrap both my arms around him.

Once we get on-board, Christian disappears for a few minutes I assume to talk to the pilot. I sit down on one of the leather seats, whilst Kate and Elliot sit down at the other side of the aisle.

"This is impressive Elliot" I hear Kate say.

"That's my baby brother, he's not worth over ten billion dollars for nothing"

"Ten billion dollars?" Kate chokes out.

"Probably more actually, I don't really know"

"Wow, did you hear that Steele?" she asks me.

"Yes I did but I don't care how much money he has Kate, I'm not with him for that" I tell her but she doesn't reply, does she think I'm with him for his money? I brush it aside as Christian appears and heads straight for me.

"You look beautiful" he whispers in my ear as he sits down and I blush a deep shade of red.

"We will be there in just over eleven hours"

"Eleven hours? That's a really long time" I complain.

"I know but…"

"Hey bro! Thanks for letting us use your jet, this is a much better way of flying"

"I second that" Kate says and I don't know why but all this talk about Christian's wealth is starting to annoy me a little bit, I lean my head against Christian's shoulder and close my eyes and before we've even set off, I'm asleep.

 **CPOV:**

 _She's beautiful…fuck, she's beautiful!_ And now, I have her, she's mine. I wasn't expecting her to say she loved me, I wasn't even going to tell her, I was going to tell her in Barbados, I had it all planned out but then when I saw her I just knew I had to say it and then she tells me she loves me back. Looking at her now, her head resting on my shoulder, her hand in mine I just know that for once in my life I have got something right, how she managed to fall asleep so quickly I don't know but she is completely out, her breathing has slowed right down, I can't help but stare at her. We've been given the all clear to take off out seatbelts and I immediately stand up to pick Ana up and take her into the bedroom that's at the back of my jet. As gently as I can, I pick her up, she murmurs something and wraps her arms around my neck whilst I carry her though to the bedroom. Once in there I shut the door behind me and then I proceed to lay her down, she opens her eyes whilst I am doing so and I can't help but smile at her.

"I love you" she whispers and my heart stops.

"I love you too baby, go back to sleep, I'll come and wake you in a little while"

"Please stay here, I just want us to be alone for a while" she frowns.

"What's wrong?"

"I…I don't know, just forget it I'm being stupid"

"No baby, tell me what it is" I sit on the bed next to her.

"I just forget how wealthy you are, I mean, you have your own private jet whilst I can barely make rent at the end of the month. I just want you to know that I am not with you for your money, I don't want you to ever think that…"

"I don't think that, I would never think that, what's brought this on?"

"I, Kate, she just said something earlier that got me thinking"

"Thinking about what?"

"Well whilst you was talking to the pilot, Kate got talking to Elliot how impressive all this is, and they were talking about how much money you have and once I told Kate I wasn't with you for that and she didn't say anything it got me thinking that maybe that's what everyone thinks…that I'm just with you for your wealth"

"Baby, listen to me, I don't what you thinking this, I know the truth and that's all that matters. Please ignore Kate and let's try and enjoy our holiday" I'm going to strangle Elliot for talking about how much money I have to Kate, it's none of their business.

"Thank you for believing me"

"You've got nothing to thank me for Ana, this holiday is about us, my brother doesn't know this but me and you are staying in a completely different hotel, I wanted us to be alone, yes we can meet up with them, have dinner with them sometimes but I want this to be all about you and me, like we said and nothing more"

"You've done that?"

"Yes, I have, that was going to be another little surprise"

"Christian, you are incredible, I know she's my best friend and I love her but she's always had money and I haven't, her parents are already in Barbados waiting for us, I've had to use some of my savings just to afford this and…"

"That's why me and you are staying somewhere else, Elliot is the one who's got to meet Kate's parents and impress them, we on the other hand…" and I grin at her and she giggles with a loving smile on her face.

"That's what I like to see, your smile, do you want to go back out there?" she nods.

We spent the next few hours in the company of Kate and Elliot, I still need to have a word with Elliot but I'll wait until we are alone, he shouldn't be telling Kate about how much money I have, I know I am known to be worth billions but I don't want it broadcasted around like it's no big deal, it can land you a lot of enemies and I don't want Ana worried about anything. I'm going to be completely spoiling her over the next week, I've planned nearly everything out, our first date is planned and everything after that. I changed the hotel I was staying in so that me and Ana can be a little further away and have a little more privacy and basically just be alone together, I feel we both want and need it.

"You tired baby?" I ask Ana as I see her yawn and she nods.

"Go and lay down for a while, we've still got 8 hours left of flying" she sighs and then stands up.

"I'll be with you in a minute" I whisper in her ear, she nods again and then disappears into the back bedroom. I notice Kate is also asleep so I take the chance and quietly talk to Elliot.

"El, I want to ask you something, or more like ask you not to do something, I don't want you talking about how much money I have"

"Bro, I didn't mean any harm in it, it is kind of a known fact that you are filthy rich"

"That maybe so but it makes Ana feel uncomfortable and I don't want Kate knowing anything about me"

"Christian, Kate isn't going to tell anyone"

"I don't care El, Ana is my priority, we've come on this holiday to enjoy it and I don't want this hanging over us"

"Ok, ok, I won't say another word"

"Thank you, I appreciate it, there's also something else…"

"What is it?"

"Well I know you and Kate are obviously going to be staying together so I've booked myself and Ana into a different hotel so we can spend some time together and have some privacy"

"Ok, you've gone all out haven't you?"

"I have, I want Ana happy"

"Bro, she just has to be near you and she's instantly happy"

"You've got to impress Kate's parents on this holiday"

"Don't I know it, I'm not really sure how I'm going to do it yet"

"I'm sure you'll be fine"

"I have a question I wanted to ask you, I know you want to spend all your time alone with Ana and I get that but I was hoping we could spend time together too, I mean, your my brother and I hardly ever see you, before Ana, I saw you like once a month, sometimes close to two months...and before you say it, yes I know you have a lot of responsibilities, you are the most successful man I know but your still my baby brother, just think about it please?"

"I don't have to think about it El"

"Thanks bro, now I think you better go to Ana" I nod and clasp his shoulder as I stand up.

"It's good to see you happy Christian, Ana is an incredible girl"

"I know" and with that I wonder off towards the bedroom.


End file.
